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Satire: "Chick-fil-A Introduces New Hate Sauce"; A Comment

Friday, August 3, 2012 0:57

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“Chick-fil-A Introduces New Hate Sauce”

by Andy Borowitz

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)— “Customers across the nation who turned out for Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day were in for a surprise, as the chicken restaurant chose today to launch a new product, Hate Sauce. Delighted customers mobbed the restaurants to try the zesty new sauce, with many chicken fanciers ordering their sandwiches with extra hate. “It’s so spicy it makes your mouth feel like it’s on fire—like a gay couple in hell,” said Harland Dorrinson, who sampled the sauce at a Chick-fil-A in Orlando.

But even as Chick-fil-A prepared to call its new hate sauce an instant hit, it faced a challenge from an upstart rival, Wing-n-nuts. The rival chain, based in Falls Church, Virginia, chose today to introduce a new product targeting Chick-fil-A patrons, the Chicken Bacon Bigotwich. “We think we’re going to take a big bite out of Chick-fil-A’s customer base,” said Wing-n-nuts corporate spokesperson Carol Foyler. “Their founder is anti-gay. But ours is anti-gay, anti-immigrant, and anti-woman. When word gets out about that, there’ll be lines around the block.”

- http://www.newyorker.com/

•

A comment: You know folks, all this hatred, just not a good thing at all. But something I’ve learned along the way is relevant too, and that is that those with the biggest mouths, making the most noise, especially about homosexuality, are usually the ones who secretly have something within themselves that they don’t dare confront or ever express. Total hypocrisy. As far as gay marriage, besides being none of my business at all, what the hell does that have to do with my life, or what goes on in my own bedroom? I’m not gay, but really, what is it my business what anyone else does or how they express their love? It’s none of my business, and I personally could care less what anyone else does in their own homes, or who they marry. What I do care about is small minded bigots like these who think they have the right to tell everyone else how to live, and dare to stand in judgement of anyone who doesn’t agree with their own philosophy, religion, or lifestyle. To those people I say, you may go directly to the hell you’re so fond of threatening the rest of us with… I’d say it in more colorful terms, of course, but this blog’s PG rating won’t let me, lol. Lucky for them…

- CP

2012-08-02 23:46:34

Source: http://coyoteprime-runningcauseicantfly.blogspot.com/2012/08/satire-chick-fil-introduces-new-hate.html

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