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By The Bill Sticker Alternative
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For the moment

Saturday, October 29, 2016 11:22
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(Before It's News)

Until some bastard ruins it of course, life is good. The clouds that have marred the past two years are gradually clearing, and providing everyone does their job properly (Something I will be keeping a very close eye on) the Sticker household can look forward to a much rosier future. Winning after such a protracted battle is very, very nice indeed. A sensation only marred by the knowledge that if those concerned had followed my guidance last bloody year, the recent legal and financial mess I’m just extricating myself from could have been avoided altogether. I’d have probably made more money too, but what the hell, I’m getting out of a toxic business relationship and will not enter another like it again. Not without a differently worded contract. So that is a compensation. Everything is a learning experience and the approaching sound of people finally coughing up is Handel’s Messiah to my shell-likes. Well boys, you took your bloody own sweet time. However, now it’s all over bar the shouting, I’m going to contemplate being able to lie back and enjoy the things that are the best in life. What me? sarcastic? Never… (Embarrassed cough)

The following rather sums up my current world view.

Yes, and if you are a sarky old git like my fellow members of the Bill Sticker Society for Sarcasm and Irony, then you’re naturally more intelligent (Scientifically proven, see below), and by being sarcastic force other people to up their intellectual game. Stopping the less mentally acute coasting through their lives and apply the brakes (or accelerator) of self examination. Rescuing them from the living death of pointless conformity. Bringing the PC-afflicted a little non-violent emotional release. I mean, come on, doesn’t using sarcasm successfully make you feel better against the aggressive, and more pertinently, the passive-aggressive?

Like ‘preferred gender pronouns’ for example. An idea only liked by a few eccentric academics and the mentally ill (These terms may be viewed as interchangeable). If the poisonous bill C-16 gets onto the books in Canada, then the only defence against the politically correct speech code it enforces will be sarcasm.

Some say sarcasm may be the lowest form of wit, but those who do rather miss the point. Sarcasm is actually a readily learnable linguistic response which provides, not only a social defence mechanism for the powerless, but an offensive tool in the war for civilisation against the Politically Correct and insufferably earnest and dull. And we mustn’t offend them, must we?

More than twice an hour. (Twinkle) Or more. (Twinkle, snort of derision)

Sarcasm. An essential tool for dealing with the stumbling blocks of life. Without it, our current civilisation could not exist. Got to love it.

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