We Are the Enemy We’ve Been Waiting For.

This does not bode well for my future as MOTUS (Mirror Of The United States):

That’s right; simply by peering into the mirror, we have met the enemy and, shockingly, he is us.

“We are the enemy we have been waiting for”

As always, the people responsible for this travesty will be held accountable, so I expect to receive my notice of (paid) administrative leave shortly.

Butt wait! I think I’ve found an IRS approved loophole!

You can’t really blame an empty chair can you?

Good work MOTUS! – if I do say so myself.

With a h/t to Clint Eastwood, allow me to make my case for clemency with this little vignette I like to call  “It’s like talking to an empty chair”:

Scene 1: the IRS

“Okay, which one of you two clowns authorized the IRS targeting of conservative groups for harassment?”

“It wasn’t us, Congressman. It was the empty chair, right here, that authorized it.”

“Look, the President said he didn’t even know about it until he heard it on Fox News.”

“Okay then, it was Lois.”

“I didn’t do anything wrong, and if he doesn’t have to answer questions then neither do I.”

Scene 2: Benghazi

“Our consulate is under attack by Libyan terrorists; our ambassador and his staff are in grave danger. Request permission to send in the Marines, Mr. President.”

“Mr. President?”

“I’ve got a fundraiser in the morning, Leon, get a hold of Valarie.”

“Look Leon, you know I’m not leaving my fingerprints on that. Besides, I don’t have the ‘authority.’ Ask Hillary.”

“Sorry Leon, you know Val’s rules; the empty chair is the only one who can do that.”

“Sorry Leon, wheels are up; you know I have to turn off all my portable devices now. Check in with me again after I’ve caught a few zzz’s.”

Scene 3: Spying on AP/Fox News

“Journalists should not be at legal risk for doing their jobs,” Mr. Obama said in a wide-ranging address on counterterrorism policy. “Our focus must be on those who break the law.”

Mr. Obama said he raised the issue with Attorney General Eric H. Holder Jr., who he said shared those concerns and would gather representatives from news media organizations as part of the review. Mr. Obama instructed Mr. Holder to report back to him by July 12.

With the truth, the whole truth and nothing butt…

“This might get awkward, Ricky, so let’s just make sure your investigation doesn’t turn up any more embarrassing facts about this little wiretap exercise, Okay?”

“Of course Bo, we’ll only interview the people who know nothing.”

I’m sure everything will turn out just fine. After all, Big Guy’s taking counsel from the best.

“Look Boo-Rock, a little advice: you’ve got to do more than assemble an enemies list. But nottoo much more.”

So in closing then: when Big Guy says “there’s no there there,” you can take him at his word. Literally.

Note to self: this might fall under the rubric of too much more: