Not My Horse, But This Is My Rodeo

Appearing on David Letterman last Thursday, Lady M proved again that you can never do too much self promotion (partial list so far this year: Kimmel, Fallon, Ellen, Glamour, Night Shift, and last butt hardly least, the Black Girls Rock! event).

Black Girl, rockin’

Donning a regal purple v-neck, flared dress MO dished with Dave on things like Joining Forces – Lady M’s military PR program – and college education (everyone should get one; for free).

Then things shifted to more serious issues: Lady M’s career after being FLOTUS: she’s either going to be president, or a nanny for David Letterman’s children (although that last option seems a bit racist, no?)

“We could do things – I would help you raise your children…I can help you through the dark times.”  Wait a minute – “dark times?” What exactly is that code for?

And then she and Dave discussed the difficulty of raising said children and in the course of the discussion managed once again to embarrass the girls she’s constantly trying to shield from the media:

“We have one who generally stays here,” Mrs. Obama said, gesturing with her hand to show an even keel. “And then we have one we call our grumpy cat, our salty biscuit. You just never know what you’re going to get from that one.”

Asked which daughter was which, the first lady demurred. “I’m not saying – they could be watching,” she said. “But they know who they are.” – NYT

Well that’s good, protecting their identities. Now we’ll never know which Wee Won inherited your personality.

We’ll never know which of the girls is “that one”

In other weekend news, I heard that Pharrell won the Kentucky Derby yesterday! Congratulations!

Pharrell Williams performing at the 2015 Grammys

Man that little monkey can run! OMG! Did I just say that? I’ll just go sit in the corner by the tea trolley and consider the possible racist connotations of my remark. And I’d like to take this opportunity to apologize to anyone who may have been offended by my remark and intends to take action to impact my non-existent income. I will also appoint Little Mo to conduct an independent investigation of my actions and propose harsh sanctions for violating my own rule against simian references. Which, I may then choose to ignore because…this is my rodeo!

Giddy up!

And in my defense, I didn’t start this meme on my own. Some liberal weenie did that for me.

From Not My Circus, Not My Monkey

In other carnival news, be sure to read Clarice’s Pieces report today on: The Great American Traveling Riot Circus.