Madonna’s Gonna Be A Busy, Busy Girl

Madonna recently announced while opening for an Amy Schumer show:

“If you vote for Hillary Clinton,” Madonna told the crowd at Madison Square Garden, “I will give you a blow job.”

“And I’m good,” the 58-year-old “Like a Virgin” singer, an outspoken supporter of the Democratic presidential nominee, said to cheers from the audience.

“I’m not a tool. I take my time,” Madonna boasted. BJ’s for Hillary

Goodness gracious, those Democrats really do go all in to get the vote out don’t they.

Doubtless Madonna’s promise was made tongue in cheek. But I wonder if she has any idea what she could be in for.

Madonna is 58. And millions of people will vote for Hillary Clinton. In the 2012 Presidential election, some 66 million voted for Obama. So, lets assume that just 50 million vote for Hillary in 2016. Assuming that half of them are men, that’s 25 million.

But it wouldn’t really be 25 million would it? After all, some men might be too old, or married and care about it, or otherwise just not interested in Madonna’s generous offer. So, let’s say she has to deal with just 5 million.

Bearing in mind Madonna’s claims that she is really good and takes her time, let’s assume 5 minutes per. With a 10 minute break every hour, that’s 10 per hour. For an 8 hour day, that’s 80 a day, 400 in a 5 day work week, and 20,000 a year allowing 2 weeks vacation. So 5 million ought to take her around …

Two Hundred and Fifty years.

So, at age 58, if Madonna keeps her word, she’ll be really, really busy for the rest of her life.

Dang. Perhaps Moochelle can help with a new hashtag.

#GoFundMe.com/Kneepads for Madonna!

When was it again that this madness will be over?