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Seek and Ye Shall Find Potential Voters

Saturday, October 8, 2016 3:26
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(Before It's News)

As this presidential election season heats up, there has been … let’s say …  innovation, in registering people to vote.

Despite being unable to vote themselves because they are in the country illegally, Hillary Clinton’s campaign is using so called Dreamers to register voters. Illegal Dreamers register voters

In response to Trump’s comments that the extent of illegal immigration is so great that soon there will be Taco trucks on every corner, Democrats are using Taco trucks as voter registration sites. Taco truck voter registration

Not to be outdone, Republicans in Florida, to vociferous complaints of Democrats, are holding voter registration drives at Chick-fil-A restaurants. Chick-fil-A

Now I understand the need to get people registered in order to win elections. And each party doubtless wants do so where they think their potential voters might be found. Thus Democrats use illegals to register … well, illegals Mexicans I guess. And ditto with Taco trucks … although I know many conservative Gringos who like tacos too. And Republicans head to Chick-fil-A, because they think leftists hate Chick-fil-A. But I wonder, like the Taco truck Gringos, if that is really so. Do leftists love the chicken sandwich but hate the Chick-fil-A? Nah. That reasoning is too close to, “Love the sinner, but hate the sin.” And God Allah Gaia forbid that such logic might rub off.

But in this election season where sexuality, especially broken, vulgar sexuality, ranging from a rehash of Bubba’s predatory sexual misdeeds to Trump’s recent locker room talk (though not like any locker room I’ve ever been in) about grabbing women where the transvaginal probe goes, it is no surprise that voter registration efforts would take a dive into the gutter as well. And in this regard, Democrats in Arizona are breaking new ground.

Sonny’s Gentlemen’s Club in Chandler, Arizona is hosting a candidates meet and greet where they will be able to register new voters, talk to dancers and patrons, and meet lobbyists who have worked against legislation supported by the conservative Center for Arizona Policy (CAP).

Ads for the meet and greet, dubbed “Electile Dysfunction Meet the Candidates and the Pole-iticians!” highlight Sonny’s beef with CAP:

Since 1995, the Center for Arizona Policy has passed 151 bills into law that strip Arizonans of our own bodily autonomy, our freedom to our own relationships – our basic civil and human rights. From abortion to sex-ed to strip clubs, CAP has turned women’s bodies into a battleground.

eventflyer1

My my, the folks at Sonny’s are right clever … bless their hearts.

So far only Green Party and Democrat Party candidates are expected to show at the Electile Dysfunction Meet the Candidates and the Pole-iticians! event (quite the surprise there).

Now I supposes that the next natural step for leftist voter registration efforts would be to seek even spicier venues . So I have to say I’m glad that La Grange, Texas’ famed Chicken Ranch bordello, of The Best Little Whore House in Texas renown, is closed. So we won’t have a “Best Little Voter Registration Drive” to contend with. But our leftist friends need not despair over this. After all, Dennis Hof’s Moonlite Bunny Ranch in Harry Reid’s home state of Nevada is open for business. And fortuitously for the progressives, the Bunny Ranch has a vibrant Hookers For Hillary webcampaign, which indicates that the Bunny Ranch would be fertile ground for registering voters.

But there is more.

Following the recent Huma and Anthony Weiner split, Hof offered Anthony a job as Social Director. And why not. Anthony has, after all, proven himself a right sociable fellah. And Hof recognizes talent when he sees it.

This guy is a great orator, and his political career showed that”, Hof said. “Clearly, his communication skills also extended into the world of digital media, and that is a huge component of our business in 2016. The very thing that killed him in politics and prompted his wife to leave him is a valued skill in my world. As the Bunny Ranch’s social media director, an insatiable appetite for sexually charged posting is not only encouraged, it’s part of the job description!”

I don’t know if Weiner has assumed the position at the Bubby Ranch, but he would certainly be a sizeable attraction for left leaning voters all across America due to his unique qualifications. And imagine the advertisements.

2016 Bunny Ranch Voter Drive!

Take a Walk on the Wild Side!
Meet & Greet with Anthony “Carlos Dangler Danger” Weiner
Free Eats & Adult Libations!
YUGE Discount on all Services if you Register to Vote

I cannot wait for this election to be over.

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