You know that old joke about recognizing a vegan?
Well, you can now add “Don’t worry. They’ll crash into your chicken truck” to the punchline.
See, vegans can’t just be happy with living their life as they see fit. They’re filled with supercilious smugness about their lifestyle. They can’t be just happy with eating nothing but grass, wearing hemp, eschewing any article of clothing, accessory, or bath product that’s ever touched an animal – or was even in the vicinity of one – smelling like rancid BO and patchouli, and feeling superior about it. They’re miserable, overbearing busybodies, who obviously figure if they’re going to be miserable and unhinged, the whole world must be forced to join them.
Enter Judith Moriah Armstrong.
The investigation began when a truck driver told police he was traveling west on Hwy. 72 when a red four-door car hit the side of his truck. The driver said he initiated his brakes only to have the suspect vehicle slam into his truck once more – spinning in front of the truck in the process.
The truck driver pulled over and called 911 as the red car fled. He only had a basic description of the driver, a woman with shoulder length red hair. Had that been all that Madison County deputies had to work with, she might not have been as easy to find. However they reported that there was debris from the crash left on the side of the road – including her license plate.
You know what happened next, right?
Crazy bitch was tracked down to her house, refused to leave unless police secured a warrant (OK, that’s fine), but spoke with officers through a window and admitted to hitting the truck. Because it was a chicken truck, and she was a vegan.
I know you’ll be shocked to know that alcohol was involved, although, she claims she took a few shots when she got home, after she intentionally hit another person’s vehicle – twice – and then fled the scene.
Consider the irony here. Vegans reject the commodity status of animals, and renounce the use of animal products… because kindness to our fellow living beings or some such shit.
And yet, deranged ginger here intentionally hit the truck more than once, putting both the live creature operating the vehicle and the living beings in the back of said vehicle in mortal peril.
Guess the actual lives and well being of actual live creatures don’t matter when psychotic vegans decide their ideology must be obeyed at all costs.
I wonder if they’ll cater to her dietary preferences in jail.