Diarrhea-Squirting Judge Is Too Obese to Perform Her Lavishly Compensated Patronage Job

Maybe it is for the best that Daniel McCullough collected his excessive salary while others did his work. Another judge who is also too obese to do her job sometimes shows up for work anyway — and the results are not pleasant to behold. Introducing Elizabeth Shollenberger:

Members of the all-Democratic City Council in suburban White Plains (New York) rewarded their party’s well-connected chairwoman with a plum six-figure judicial seat — even though she was too sickly to work, critics charge.

City Judge Elizabeth Shollenberger — who suffers from a digestive disorder and morbid obesity, among other ailments — was unable to climb the three steps to her courtroom bench, even with the help of a specially installed railing, sources said.

Shollenberger is so sickly, she goes around with an oxygen tank.

City Judicial Review Committee member Mark Elliott has publicly accused Mayor Tom Roach of making sure “the fix was in” for the judge, who had been his campaign treasurer.

The committee rejected her for the post, as it was obvious she would not be able to complete her 10-year term.

But she got the job anyway, and promptly went on the first of several medical leaves just a week after being sworn in to her $175,500-a-year job.

The job also provides $65,000 worth of annual health benefits, which the currently hospitalized Shollenberger has been putting to good use.

The situation smells awful enough without considering her “severe gastric distress problem”:

“She would come in and we would see the diarrhea running down her leg and to the floor,” one court worker said. “She would soil the chair and then ask for a new one.”

Another court worker said Shollenberger astounded staffers by acting with “complete arrogance” following the awful accidents.

“She would just say, ‘There is a mess over there. I think someone should clean it up,’” the source said.

Why was a woman who squirts diarrhea all over the workplace made a judge?

Council member Milagros Lecuona, who’s challenging Roach for the mayoralty this year, said he engineered Shollenberger’s Dec. 20 appointment “to make sure he’d have the support of the chair of the Democratic Party” for his re-election bid.

Shollenberger was succeeded as the party’s head by her husband, Tim James.

That explains everything.

On tips from Sean C, KirklesWorth, and Varla.