Man Sues Universal Theme Park Over its ‘Deceptive’ Unlimited Drink Deal – We Want Justice, and We Want it Now!

Sometimes ya just gotta file a lawsuit.

Especially if you’ve been thirsting for one.

Such, apparently, is the case for Luis Arnaud. The Bronx resident’s begun a class action lawsuit against NBCUniversal over a lack of received blessings while he visited the company’s Universal Orlando theme park — essentially, his cup didn’t runneth over.

Luis took the park up on its offer of unlimited soda refills from Coca-Cola Freestyle machines, but he discovered there was a waiting period: He could only load his beverage bucket with enough sugar to kill a horse every 10 minutes.

Yes — it was that bad.

The cups cost $16.99 and are microchipped to be good for a whole day, so Luis snagged one during a visit to Volcano Bay and Islands of Adventure in July. He also re-upped the following day for $8.99.

But at some point during that diabetic 48-hour free-for-all, after “quenching his thirst,” he was denied a second refill.

The machine laid out the punishing truth:

“Hi. You are not quite ready to fill up.”

Luis took a photo, which is now part of the legal revolt he initiated Thursday.

In the complaint, he insists he was never informed he couldn’t pour copious amounts of Coke down his gullet like Mean Joe Greene and then immediately do it all again.

Luis thinks “deceptive” NBCU is a Mean Joe, and now — presumably — he wants some green.

The lawsuit doesn’t specify a damage amount, but a jury trial has been “demanded.”

Let’s all hope the falcon of justice really does a number on the pigeon of high fructose corn syrup constraint with this one.

-ALEX

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Women In Vancouver Lose Their Businesses As A Man Tries To Legally Force Them Into Waxing His LadyScrotum

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