Sharn Is Laid To Rest

Today was the day to bury Sharn.

The day was dark and gloomy. Once more, rain poured forth from the skies in a deluge when we began our trip this morning. It had just stopped when we pulled into the parking lot of the mortuary/cemetery, and huge puddles inches deep and 5 to 15 feet wide covered the parking lot. We went inside to warm up by their fireplace and drink some tea until it was time to go to the site a half hour later.

I tried a little weather magick. “If a witch can’t get a little dry sky for a friend’s burial, what good is she?” I commented. We stepped outside and the winds started whipping up. The clouds parted above our heads within a handful of minutes and it was sunny the entire walk to the burial site (we walked alongside the century old wagon, called a caisson, that carried Sharn’s body).

As the 3 of us (including Summer) headed up to the location where they do green burials. I was dressed in my goth-wear: black everything, including a velvet skirt and cloak. I joked that as a lifelong Goth, I “have been ready for this my entire life!” Summer and Cat laughed at that.

Cat chose to pull the caisson herself, it was light enough. Summer and I followed behind. The sun continued to shine… (I wanted to show what this looked like because we don’t see enough of things like this in life. You can see the sunshine with the heavy, dark clouds surrounding us. And Sharn wrapped in a thick linen shroud made in Ireland.)

We came to the covered shelter above the freshly dug grave, and Cat and 3 men carried Sharn in her shroud by hand to the grave and lowered her in while Summer and I held hands, watching. Then the cemetery men parted for about 20 minutes, so we could do our private service.

To begin with, we 3 cried and hugged. This was it. We just stared down at her and took in the reality of it.

Then I took a keep breath and went back to my Priestess training. I headed the modest pagan service, saying words about honoring the body Sharn used in life to live, love, and laugh with, etc. (Words in yesterday’s entry.) Summer and Cat held one another while I spoke– neither of them could speak for a time. Eagles circled overhead and kept passing right over our little spot in the wide field. The wind blew (as you can see obviously in the photo below of me on site). The sun shone. All around us, the clouds were dark blue and gray, but they remained at bay for the duration of taking her body to the site, lowering her in, and my words of welcoming to the earth.

Then the cemetery men returned, and Cat did the first few shovelfuls of sand and dirt over Sharn’s shrouded body. As she did so, the clouds closed in, step by step, and as the shroud disappeared under the earth, so too did the sun disappear behind the clouds. Summer whispered, “Wow…” It seemed so perfectly apropos.

We walked back to the parking lot, the wind still blowing, as the dark day held sway once more. It remained dark and even pouring rain the rest of the day everywhere we went. No more blue skies at all anywhere. I guess my spell worked, eh? I really didn’t know if it would work, but I guess nature was with me. I still wore sturdy leather boots to squelch through the mud, though.

We were very pleased with the service we got– only a quarter to a third of the cost of a “normal,” even relatively modest burial. The body is pulled by hand to the site from the mortuary, buried only 4 feet down with a dirt/sand/mulch mix to augment the natural decaying process, a boulder is inscribed, and native plants and/or trees are planted on top or next to the burial site. It is exactly what Sharn wanted– we just didn’t know they did “green” burials until very recently!

Afterwards, we stopped at the Tea Room again in an historic downtown area for a luncheon with Summer. It was Sharn’s favorite place in the area, so how could we pass it up?

Driving home through the rain, I started crying thinking about the last thing I heard Sharn say to Cat (that I could understand) the very last time I saw her: “I want my mommy!” That killed me. Just an arrow through my soul… Cat answered perfectly though. She said, “I know. You can ask for your mom to come get you, and she will come. Until then, I’m here and I’ll watch over you.” The memory of that moment only struck me riding home through driving rain.

Saying good-bye means not having to watch after her anymore. I just lost it for a bit…

Tomorrow is her memorial wake. Good food, a featured cocktail, and friends and family sharing stories.