The WIRE: Your week in review

From Paris to the potty — and most points in between — it’s time for a look back at the week that was. Personal Liberty Digest^® presents: The WIRE!

Broke: “If we don’t abide by the Kyoto Accord, everyone is gonna die!”
Woke: “If we don’t abide by the Paris Accord, everyone is gonna die!

Joke: “If we don’t abide by meaningless, non-binding pseudo-treaties, the Earth will care.”

Amidst all the hyperventilating, here’s a fun fact: If the world does end because President Donald Trump pulled us out of the Paris Climate Agreement, it will mark the first prediction global warmists got right.

Ever.

The same people clutching their pearls over the economic effects of quitting the non-treaty also told coal miners they’d be able to get work with “green” companies.

Always looking for people to help pack up when they go bankrupt.

Hollywood actor Leonardo DiCaprio chimed in moments before Trump made his announcement, asking him to “make the moral decision today to protect future generations.”

He would have said something earlier, but service gets spotty when his gigantic yacht is at sea.

1970s: Global Cooling is real!
1990s: Global Warming is real!
2010s: Climate Change is real!

The entire time: Weather is real.

The science is settled, huh?

Tell me again how many genders there are, “settled science” people.

Hillary Clinton told a paying audience this week that the Democratic Party is responsible for her losing, joining a list that now includes most of the species.

Except for one person, of course.

She didn’t do herself any favors with some of the surrogates she chose to speak on her behalf.

What was she thinking letting that brain-damaged old lady campaign in her place?

Democratic Party heavyweight Michael Moore asserted this week that President Trump is to blame for the rise in left wing violence, accusing him of “fomenting” their crimes.

That’s like blaming cake for you weighing more than some countries.

“Mr. President, betcha can’t tweet some random thing that will get the entire planet talking for 24 straight hours.”

“Watch this.”

The world recoiled in horror when comedienne Kathy Griffin tweeted what may have been the most gut-churningly disgusting image in history.

Oh yeah, and there was an effigy of President Trump’s decapitated head in it, too.

While the makers of the Squatty Potty^™ flushed their association with Griffin almost immediately, CNN needed to sit and think about wiping her role as Anderson Cooper’s creepy older sister in their annual New Year’s Eve telecast.

The company that works with feces has higher standards than the one that spreads it.

Democrats delighted in news that Trump’s son Barron was terrified when he first saw the image, thinking it was real.

The party of Planned Parenthood thinks psychologically torturing an 11 year-old is H-I-LARious. Color me unsurprised.

Chelsea Clinton said this week that she “doesn’t know how she will explain Donald Trump to her kids.” She’s gonna have a hard enough time explaining Nana to them.

And if she thinks that’s tough, wait until they ask about Grandpa Bill being a serial rapist.

The New York Times announced this week that they will be eliminating their Public Editor position, leaving oversight to their readers.

Crowdsourcing journalistic integrity to The New York Times subscribers. What could possibly go wrong?

When Texas State Representative Matt Rinaldi called immigration enforcement on a group of illegal aliens who joined leftist hate groups protesting the Lone Star State’s anti-sanctuary city bill, they responded with violence and death threats.

Nice when they make your point for you.

And that’s your week in review! For the Personal Liberty Digest^®, I’m Ben Crystal saying “See you next week on the WIRE!”

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