Tuesday, November 15, 2016
by Mike Adams, the Health Ranger
(NaturalNews) You may have heard by now that leftist activists who hate democracy are planning a massive “protest” on January 20 at the inauguration of President Trump. See Soros and Liberal Mega-Donors are Plotting to Resist Trump Behind Closed Doors from Planet Free Will. What you may not have heard yet, however, is that these same leftists are hoping to escalate the protest into a communist coup against the government, taking over the power structure of Washington D.C. and declaring Hillary Clinton to be their “dear leader”.
I almost can’t stop laughing. Seriously. It hurts because I’ve been laughing so hard from last Tuesday’s election night that I’m sore. Please, liberals, stop making me laugh by posting Youtube videos of yourself screaming for mommy because the world stopped conforming to your lunacy… oh God, please make it stop…
Yes, the leftist libtards who grew up with “everyone’s a winner” school sports and who are too mentally weak to handle any challenges at all without whining and screaming like crybabies now think they can overpower the entire U.S. military and stage a successful leftist coup in Washington D.C. by bussing in unemployed leftists and telling them to “cause something.”
This is going to be hilarious to watch. I seriously can’t wait. Gonna have some popcorn ready for this one…
I know, it’s funny just to consider how all this might go down, and it begs the question of whether the crybaby leftists have thought about the logistics of delivering all the necessary diapers to their front line protesters who are apparently going to assault our nation’s capitol with some slam-dunk signs like, “Rape Melania” or “Love Trumps Hate.” (Yes, both of those wildly contradictory signs can now be spotted in the same leftist protest group, side by side, because liberalism doesn’t have to make sense! It just has to achieve the necessary level of HATE…)
They quite literally believe they are going to march into the nation’s capitol without guns (because they hate guns) and somehow overpower the world’s most powerful military (which has lots of guns) composed of soldiers who are almost universally in support of President Trump. They are going to accomplish all this, they think, by assaulting America’s psyche with violence, hatred, bigotry, intolerance and sheer stupidity, all on display for the whole world to see and backed by CNN’s on-site zombified reporters who are just as stupid and mentally disconnected from reality as the protesters they’re covering.
Can I please have a front row seat? Pretty please? This is gonna be epic…
Oh, and they also have plans to assassinate Trump, but you already knew that if you’ve been reading Twitter, the social media site that openly allows violent leftists to threaten Donald Trump’s life without their accounts being suspended. They are apparently hoping one of their leftist lunatics can be pushed over the edge into “beyond” lunacy status, and then unleashed in the direction of Donald Trump with an ice pick or something.
That attempt is going to last about five seconds, after which ice pick moron is going to be slammed to the ground by about fifty Secret Service agents who have been itching to finally kick some ass under a new President.
Oh man, I really, really want to be there to see this in person…
I’m being told by my source that patriots who wish to help defend America against the crybaby assault brigade should show up in large numbers to simply occupy the space and serve as human shields.
Do not bring any weapons to the event. Dress in casual, civilian clothing. Do not engage violent protesters. (Just LAUGH in their faces!) Let the police and the U.S. Marines do their jobs, but be available to help them out of things somehow devolve into real chaos (which isn’t likely).
The overall stance of patriots in all this is simple: Let the libtards show the world how totally insane they are, even if they try to burn down monuments or occupy the Capitol building. Trust me, they won’t succeed for very long, and it will be beyond hilarious watching crybully leftists get tossed on their heads by the U.S. Marines… or even the “Bikers for Trump” patriots who will also be attending the event.
Natural News is seriously looking to hire a photo journalist to help document all this, because we think the pictures from this attempted leftist coup will supply uproarious laughter for the next eight years, at least. If you’re interested in working for us to document the great “communist diaper uprising attempt” by libtards, find a way to contact us and we’ll chat. It could be YOUR photos featured on Natural News on January 20! (I’m totally jealous that YOU are going to be there and I’m not…)
I’m also told that no weapons will be needed to quash the leftist communist uprising because they are highly vulnerable to an old, tried-and-true tactic: DIAPER WEDGIES!
Just reach down the back of their baggy, saggy gangster jeans, grab the back of their diaper and yank it upwards with extreme vigilance. This will cause leftists to pee themselves, then crap themselves, then scream for mommy… creating the perfect opportunity to take a photo and send it to Natural News so the entire world can share in the hilarity of it all.
Those leftist crybullies who aren’t wearing actual diapers can be tripped up by tying their shoe laces together, causing them to face plant directly into the pavement. CNN will report surreptitious shoe-tying as a “whitelash” or “hate crime,” which will set off another new round of total laughter at the lunatic media that just doesn’t know when they’ve been defeated and should just go home to mope.
While all this is going on, somebody please throw a cream puff pie into Michael Moore’s face, which won’t even slow him down because he’ll just lick it off, swallow the calories, and keep lumbering forward in his droopy diaper jeans. The guy’s got some guts to keep trying to lead the lunatics on the left… you gotta give him that much, at least.
Seriously, though, the leftists are really planning a communist coup on January 20. I’m not joking, although I can’t stop laughing. I’m not even going to bother telling anyone to bring your guns because you won’t need them. You can defeat the entire front lines of the crybully libtards with nothing more than a bar of soap wrapped in an old sock. Swing it around, bash some heads, and you might just knock a little sense into these hopeless people.
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