The Unwritten California Homestead Program for the Homeless (Hopeless)

California has been indirectly pursuing a new Homestead program for the homeless including the illegal immigrants. Rumor has it that the State of California is going to license good locations for begging and panhandling on street corners. Any fees will be waived if you are on food stamps or are an illegal alien. The average panhandler makes about 24 dollars an hour. Well above the minimum state wage of $15 for flipping hamburgers, and it is not taxable. Someone is usually suppling free hypodermic needles and food locally.

Camping permits have been waived for most cities in California. The weather is great, and a good tent costs about $35. Plus, California has been declared a Sanctuary state. So, most crimes are a misdemeanor (if you keep it under $1,000). So, breaking into a car to steal a laptop computer is a two-man job. One guy breaks the window –cost $600 and the other steals the laptop $800—no one goes to jail. A concealed handgun is a misdemeanor; you will not get deported.

In college I can remember the guy down the hall with a poster that said “Ski Kansas” (the state is flat as a pancake). I think there is an invisible employment poster in the other 49 states that says “Panhandle California.” You won’t see the poster displayed on a wall, but you might just see the bus fare to get you there, in the palm of your hand. Colorado winters on the sidewalk are a bitch!

Rumor has it that the state is currently looking for “Panhandler Facilitators” that can help educate the massive influx of new residents, to fit into their new retirement vacation environment. Applicants need to have taken the following courses: “Advanced Cardboard Sign Painting 102, “Aggressive Begging 103” and “Shopping Cart Selection 100.”

The state is warning the homeless not to eat the rats, they may have been poisoned. If you have body lice, the state considers YOU the problem, NOT the lice. From my point of view, poisoning the homeless, is a one-step approach to getting rid of the Rats, lice, excrement and dirty IV needles. My solution works for all of the wrong reasons, the trouble is, the solution in place does not work.

Question: I am a homeowner and if I don’t pay my property taxes, they will take my home away from me. But a guy camping in down town LA that is in the country illegally, has more rights than I do and pays no taxes.

Looks like we either get used to the abuse or try to change it, when the next election rolls around.