Secret terrorist plot to wipe out 5,300 British soldiers uncovered

(satire – probably)

A secret plot to wipe out up to 5,300 British troops by a brutal Al Qaeda cell based in central London has been uncovered, according to the Ministry of Defence.

The terrorist group – led by a ruthless leader known only by his nom-de-guerre of ‘Daf I D’Qam Eron’ – is said to be creaming off millions of pounds in crooked payments from a small cabal of corrupt government officials based in the country’s remote capital of Chipping Norton and has drawn up plans to attack UK armed forces and eradicate as many as 20,000 soldiers, navy and airforce personnel by 2017.

The shocking terrorist plot comes only months after another sinister Al Qaeda splinter group – known as G4S - claimed significant success last summer after it succeeded in pinning down thousands of British troops in the impoverished and forbidding south-east of the country known as Stratford province after the UK government had to deploy thousands of extra troops to counter the threat of terrorism there.

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