EXCLUSIVE – leaked sample questions from Michael Gove’s new GCSE Mathematics examination

(satire?)

1. Leroy wants to buy a TV for £400 plus VAT. VAT is presently at 17½%. How much money will Leroy save if he loots it during a riot instead?
Answer: £………………………………………………………… (3 marks)

2. A class in an inner-city comprehensive contains 13 boys and 17 girls. A female pupil is chosen at random. What is the probability that she is pregnant?
Answer: ……………………………………………………… (2 marks)

3. A mini-disc player is priced at £75. It is put in the sale at 15% off. To within the nearest thousand, how many disc players will be bought by asylum seekers on benefits?
Answer: ………………………………………………………… (2 marks)

4. This is the present exchange rate from a travel agent’s office.
GBP (£) 1 = Euro (€) 1.43
A French company is buying goods in the UK. They change 1000 Euros (€) into GB pounds (£). How much better off will the UK be if we left the EU (to the nearest pound)?
Answer: £…………………………………………………………………… (2 marks)

5. Michael is X years old. David is five years older than Michael. Gideon is 2 years younger than David.
What is the probability that Michael will one day become Prime Minister?
Answer: ………………………………………………………… (2 marks)

6. A survey was done asking people to name their favourite TV programme. The results are shown in this chart:

If one of these people were chosen at random, what is the probability that
they will be a long-term unemployed scrounger who watches telly all day instead of getting a job?
Answer: ………………………………………………………… (2 marks)

7. Andrea has 237 DVDs in her collection. She has bought some new storage
boxes which hold 42 DVDs each. The boxes cost £7.95 each. How much taxpayers’ money will she waste on them if she is a Romanian single mother who was allowed to come over here to live off our benefits system under Labour’s lax immigration policies?
Answer: £……………………………………………………………………(2 marks)

8. This is a list of the ages of customers who bought newspapers in a newsagent’s one day:

4, 7, 23, 14, 8, 7, 40, 81, 45, 1

If the mean age of the customers who bought the super sizzling soaraway Sun is 40, what kind of boring old farts or mere kids must be buying the other worthless rags?
Answer: ………………………………………………………… (2 marks)

8. Crunch cereal is available in two different sizes – both of which represent excellent value:

Work out the cost of 100g of tasty, healthy, delicious, refreshing Crunch when bought in the fantastic value 450g box available in all your local supermarkets and retail outlets (to the nearest whole pence)
Answer: Great value at only ………….…………………………………………………………p (2 marks)

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This examination was sponsored by Kellogs – the makers of Crunch cereal.

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Related articles by Tom Pride:

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Toby Young – disabled children should be excluded from schools

Johnson – let’s have more schools with lashings of junk food and no disabled children

Gove demands toughening up of Olympic grading system after record success

BBFC – Michael Gove ‘too scary’ for under-12s

New English Bacchanalian exam to focus on core subjects of drinking, swearing and fighting

Jamie Oliver accuses Gove of being too starchy, tasteless and unhealthy for children

Michael Gove to scrap education in exams shakeup

Nick Clegg vows to block Michael Gove’s reforms by tripling them

Gove – free bibles to boost nutritional standards on school menus

Reading, Writing & Counting To Be Dropped In Favour Of More Useful Subjects

Act Of Gove: an event beyond human control – often of a destructive nature – for which there is no legal redress

Government Baffled By Surprise 10% Fall In University Applications After Tripling Of Fees

Education Secretary – lack of teaching no excuse for poor academic achievement

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