An Anti-Matter, Right-Wing, Crying Fruitcake Competition

See what happens when pudgy religious hysterics try to out weep each other!

Rarely have we seen such irrationality from passionate political pundits as the recent Cheeto self-dermabrasion facial by Glenn Beck. But Beck’s ablution didn’t go unnoticed by by Alex Jones, who tried to one-up him by using one of Beck’s own signature emotional breakdowns, baby babbling and crying-on-camera while invoking Sky Daddy to protect this great (presumably all-Christian) nation, and Jones and his children. It was an anti-matter moment as Jones broke down, nearly unintelligible himself, as he called Beck demon-possessed. Demons, in case you didn’t know, are the equally imaginary, equally human-created, dirty tricks team of the equally imaginary Satan, the nemesis of the equally imaginary God Guy.

Perhaps Beck and Jones are both playing follow-the-weeper to John Boehner, who’s public dementia-on-demand performances included a turn-on-the-faucet moment when the Holy Papa met the Podium Plumber. Of course meeting so many men in chic (but modest) Italian-designer dresses could have been enough to move Boehner to prove he was some kind of potentially portable baptismal font himself, which would make a lovely addition to the Pope Mobile, and a thereby logical post-congressional position.

It seems that there’s something about Christianity that really does infantilize many people, indeed many men. The whole “God’s children” thing seems to have produced a number of prominent public figures whose responses to moments deserving of thoughtful responses instead produce torrents of tears and kindergarten antics.

God Overruled

But I digress. Beck proclaimed that Ted Cruz was “anointed by God” to become the next president. Even with the support of both of the former presidents Bush, God – who you may remember from blogs like this – is still having a hard time of it, having now been overruled by masses of his impudent, upstart, apparently not-content-to-be-weeping, Republican kids. And of course it’s not the first time the Big Fella didn’t get his way. Countless sporting teams, armies and countries can attest to that, if they haven’t already succumbed to convenient amnesia, certain though they once may have been of his unconquerable support to slay their opponents (a strangely pervasive element throughout religious history).

Such overwhelming disappointments may in fact be why these weeping weaklings break down when they’ve failed to conquer all opposition through irrationality and intimidation, all but crying for their mothers, as the presumed will of their Cloud-bound Father is easily negated when other people simply take responsibility for their own preferred actions and choices.

Risking the wrath of the Original Smotester, the genocidal terrorist and Merciless God of Love and Mercy of the Old Testament, who magically morphed into the more benign, Son-sacrificing Sadist of the New Testament, many people are separating themselves from the supernatural, superstitious sects and cults, with their irrational rituals and ridiculous, fear-inducing beliefs and teary-eyed tyrants.

The Spiritual Teaching

For those who do prefer love, peace, freedom and harmony over histrionics and horror, who value rationality over rage, they can refresh themselves with the consciousness-cleansing clarity of books likeThe Way to Live and The Might of the Thoughts, found here, along with films like And Did They Listen? and When Truth Prevails, which I am proud to say are being represented at the 2016 Cannes Film Market.

See also:

Son Reveals Antonin Scalia Was a Sinner

An Anti-Matter, Right-Wing, Crying Fruitcake Competition originally appeared on They Fly Blog on May 7, 2016.