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By SnoopyTheGoon
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CNN invents a new source of energy - and more

% of readers think this story is Fact. Add your two cents. When not preoccupied by inventing  vulgar headlines, the busy bees of CNN seem to make inroads in one of the more painful aspects of our existence, namely non-existence of clean sources of energy. This time they have revolutionized an already revolutionary (according to them) new design of a blimp, developed by Lockheed Martin. Here is the punch line:

The Hybrid Airship is a helium-powered craft that can cover thousands of kilometers in a single journey, with a top speed of 60 knots.

Just to think that until now no one, Lockheed Martin’s boffins included, had thought to use helium as fuel! I bet that even helium itself hadn’t a slightest idea of its ability.

I would also add another, less novel idea: why don’t CNN anchors use helium for major announcements like that revolutionary one. It will sound much better, judge by this example:

And I promised more: here is another revolutionary discovery, about hitherto unknown quirks of modern geography:

I bet they are. After all, Aussies are so used to privacy, and now they have to have borders with all kinds…


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