Since moving to a new area, one of my main priorities was to find a home church to plug in to. Back when I lived in Washington for six months, I had found a good, solid young adult group that I visited every Sunday evening for a fellowship dinner, worship service, and sermon. I was sometimes asked to lead worship too. I loved being a part of that group. And felt encouraged after every time I went.
After moving, though, I am now about an hour away from said group, and I was eager to find a new church to transfer my roots to.
During the time I had been looking for an apartment, I joined a Facebook group in which Christians all over the state, posted ads – either looking for roommates or offering places to live. One couple contacted me about an apartment they were moving out of, and asked if I would be interested. I was but the rent was a little high and it wasn’t in the area I was looking to be. Regardless, we stayed friends on Facebook and I noticed the husband post things about a church in downtown Portland. Turns out he was the pastor of it, and after I commented on one of his posts, he reached out to me, inviting me to join them one Sunday.
It was a couple weeks before I was able to but when I did, wow was I blessed. Not only did I feel that God had led me to this church through mysterious ways (looking for an apartment + meeting the pastor through a Facebook housing page + him reaching out to me + the church is only twenty minutes away) but the message was so, so good. And one of the points the pastor touched on was how loneliness is lethal.
We, as humans, are not meant to do this thing called “life” all alone. We were created with a need for relationships and security. And we, as Christians, aren’t meant to fight by ourselves. The enemy knows how lethal loneliness is. And he’ll always try to get us at our weakest points. He’ll try to make us think that we’ve failed, that we’re worthless, that nobody loves us, that God doesn’t care about us. And when you’re lonely, sometimes you start listening to his lies. You’re just too tired and weak from fighting, and because there’s no one else there to speak truth into your life, you tend to give up.
This is why, in whatever way possible, you need to connect yourself to believers who will encourage you and pray with/for you. You need that support system. Everyone does. Search for a place to call “home”. Church isn’t just about going once a week, sitting in a pew and listening to a sermon. Church is about family; about fellowshipping with siblings in Christ. And you can’t gain personal relationships with people when you’re sitting in rows. You need to connect, to talk, to get together during the week, to gain trust, to feel like you have a safe environment to share your struggles and get counseling and encouragement.
Seek and you shall find. God will always honor His children who strive for a closer walk with Him. And He will always provide in times in need. He loves us and wants us to continue in His joy. And loneliness definitely isn’t included in that.
My advice would be to start looking in your community for faith-based outreaches and places you can plug in to and get to know believers in your specific area. It might be hard at first, but start visiting some churches, and then inquire about any groups they may have. Either Bible studies, or adult groups, or action groups, anything that would surround you with believers who will befriend you and make you feel welcome. If there’s absolutely nothing in your area (which I will find a little hard to believe) or you’ve tried out places but don’t feel like it’s where God wants you to be, try reaching out to online Christian communities, and maybe even meeting up with people in person you meet through that. Everything is available at our fingertips nowadays, including Facebook groups and Twitter accounts that are aimed specifically to different Christian age groups.
Seek and you shall find. Pray that He’ll provide the best place for you to get involved in. And He will. I promise.
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