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By The Adventures of Yorky
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extras for charleyville

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This fuckin’ weather’s not looking too good Yorky. We may be stuck here for a couple of weeks.
I fuckin’ hope not Jeff. At the rate we’re goin’, I’ll be out a’ money in 3 or 4 days.
No worries  mate, I’ve got enough to keep us goin’ for maybe a week. It depends on how hard we hit the grog.
Maybe we ought to slow down a bit then.
Fuck that for a joke Yorky. What else are we gonna’ do if we don’t drink? Sit in that tin can they call a caravan, starin’ at the walls?
     That evening, after closing time, we were sat on a bench outside the hotel eating a hamburger and drinking some beer. We hadn’t been there for long before a broken down 
ute rounded the corner on two wheels and came to an abrupt halt, right in front of us. On the back of the ute was a metal crate with half-a-dozen blokes waving shotguns around.
 (He is fat and  has a face full of stubble. In his hand is a double-barrel shotgun and in his other hand is a tinny. He is wearing a ratty old singlet and pair of stubbies. His gut, is covered in hair, which sticks out like dogs’ balls.)
G’day. How are ya?
Pretty good.
What’s the spotlight and double-barrels for? Ya going pig shootin’?
We’re huntin’ ‘bungs’ tonight. We’re chasing a couple a’ coons in an old Holden. Did they drive past ya?
“Nah mate, we’ve been here for the past half hour. We haven’t seen any abbos in a Holden.
Where are you blokes from and what ya doin’ in our town?
We’re shearers from New South.
No worries then mate. We don’t mind shearers, long as ya not coon lovers.
Not us.”, said Jeff. “We’re just mindin’ our own business, eatin’ a burger and havin’ a quiet beer.
No worries then sport. Do us a favor and let us know if they drive down this street. We’ll be back ‘round here in an hour or so.
“Ya fair dinkum about shootin’ ‘em?
Fucking oath mate. There’s too many of the back bastards around Charleville for my likin’. Besides, this town belongs to us white fellas’ not those fuckin’ bungs. See ya around. 
(They drive off up the street, shining the 12 volt spotlight up and down.)
Fuck me dead! Ya think they’re fair dinkum Jeff?
Fucking oath mate, let’s head off before the inbred bastards come back. I don’t wanna get on the wrong side of those retards!
    ( The wet weather was showing no sign of slowing down. Flash flooding was still in progress. All roads out of town were flooded so there was no way out. The weather channel was showing clips of helicopters air-lifting cattle off of small marooned islands. The whole situation was looking pretty bleak)
     My situation is as bleak as the weather. I’m down to a full middy, a packet of Drum and papers and 78 cents change in mi pocket. With a doubt, full-blown panic has set in as I sit on this bar stool
 Hey Jeff, Ya got any ideas what we were going to do for money?
Ya think ya family could wire us some money?
No mate, I don’t get along with mi old man. I’m too proud to ask him.
Doesn’t he have a farm in Victoria?
Yeah, he does mate. That’s the problem.
What d’ya mean?
He’s pissed off, big time, because he wants me to stay at home and help him work on the farm instead of cruisin’ round all over the Outback as a shearer. We had a stinkin’ row the last time I was home so now we’re not speakin’ to each other.
     It’s now obvious that no money was going to come from Jeffs’ side of the fence. My side was was as dry as a gumboot in the desert.

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