The twattering classes

At long last, Baron Adonis has blocked me on Twitter. I am thus unable to show you the tweet that clinched his final descent into bonkersness. If you are one of the dwindling few still unblocked by the Cypriot waiter’s son, you can view it here, but the gist of his assertion was this: ‘One day there will be a public inquiry into how Brexit happened, and then charges must be brought against those responsible’. At least the USSR had the compassion to put dissidents into mental care institutions: Baron Hallopeeps of Kebaberama wants all 17.4 million voters put in prison – Dead or Alive.

There used to be an old saying in the journalism trade: “If he was intelligent, he’d be bloody dangerous”. Today, no intelligence is required to achieve high Office without ever asking for a single elector’s vote. Baron Admonish did it all on his own without any recourse to the brain (his or anyone else’s) as illustrated by this wonderful outburst on BBC:

I’ve often wondered what those at Andrew’s level of intelligence think about while serving you food in Spiro’s Tara & Kleftiko Palace. Now I know. It’s a bad idea to alienate waiters.

Another mystery to me is why people become clerics in the Church of England. It was a Christian schism invented by Henry VIII on his way towards six wives, and over the centuries has mellowed into an institution whose steep decline depends on its ability to spot transient trends. That this suicidal skill is as sharp as ever can be seen in an opinion I spotted yesterday:

Now, let me make it clear that I have been put off organised religion for a great variety of reasons: its capacity to wage war, torture catechismic dissenters, eschew smokey bacon crisps, live on a diet of worms, abuse small children, and behead infidels all in the name of Holiness….for example.

But the idea of God being a man never struck me as anything but logical: allegedly, he created a Universe (that everyone finds utterly impenetrable) for no good reason; and for the human race, he specified a birth canal big enough only for the average penis, down which eight or more pounds of foetus must somehow force itself out into the world.

I could accuse the female gender of many things, but not those realities. Only a bloke would have come up with big bangs and small vaginas.

Here’s something I came across that is equally bewildering, but a lot less funny:

For those of you not fluent in Frog, herewith a rough translation of the copy above this picture of soulless existence: ‘Who would not want to have his own private garden? With all the entrances under surveillance, control of all doors, and at your disposal an easily understood environment of comfort and security.”

Who indeed? Well, perhaps all those with nothing to hide, few if any enemies, very little worth nicking, no history of pension embezzlement, and a surname bearing no resemblance at all to Bush, Clinton, Blair, Campbell, McCain, Mandelson, Verhofstadt, Juncker, Merkel, Macron, Putin, Assad, Johnson, May, Abbott or Harman.

Finally tonight, a comment that highlights the rise to unwarranted power of Guy Verhofstadt as part of a syndrome that suffuses so much EU governance:

When you’re want to be rid of someone uselessly pernicious, post them to the EU: Leon Brittan, Peter Mandelson, Neil Kinnock, Nick Clegg etc etc etc ad nauseam…….

Due to an unexpected attack of acute dental pain, The Slog’s latest analysis of creeping  corporate totalitarianism has been moved back to tomorrow….if you see what I mean. If you want to receive alerts of new Slogposts, simply go to the Home Page, click on ‘Follow The Slog’ in the right hand column…et voila! It is done.