Exceptions

The Babylon Bee reports,

After facing mounting criticism over apparent hypocrisy within its ranks, the movement using the hashtag #BelieveAllWomen has come out with an extensive list of exceptions to its directive to always believe all women no matter what.

While Americans from both sides of the aisle largely agree that women’s stories shouldn’t be dismissed out of hand, the far left’s insistence that everyone always believe all women has gotten some pushback. This list of exceptions is designed to clarify the left’s position, according to spokespeople.

Included in the list are the following:

Bill Clinton’s accusers
Potiphar’s wife
Delilah
Conservative women
Women who accuse Democratic candidates
Sarah Sanders
Any woman the left suddenly decides they don’t like anymore
Nikki Haley
Dana Loesch
Women the Democrats no longer have a political need to exploit
Melania Trump
Cersei Baratheon
Any woman who argues for pro-life causes

The full list goes on for another 8,000 pages, explaining exactly which women the left doesn’t believe while still proclaiming that everyone should “believe all women.”

“This new list lets us be consistent with our rallying cry,” said Hillary Clinton. “We can now simultaneously say that we believe all women, while conveniently ignoring or silencing women whose stories conflict with our narrative.”

The list is available online in a 587 MB PDF download, or a hard copy of the binders full of women can be purchased from Hillary Clinton’s official site.