Poliphobia?

“I’ve decided I have poliphobia,” Don said this morning.

The prefix “poli,” according to this website, derives from ancient Greek πολύς (polús, “many, much“). Don decided to use this prefix to coin the new term “poliphobia,” a fear of cities.

He does not have enochlophobia, a fear of crowds. Far from it. He’s fine with people. Nor is he “afraid” of cities. But in the last few years, he has come to loathe and despise urban settings with a passion. Driving through anything more than rural two-lane roads sends his blood pressure skyward and his temper south.

“I didn’t used to be this way,” he explains. Like me, he’s spent many years living in – and even enjoying – urban environments; but the older he gets, the less tolerance he has for such settings.

Why the change? When I asked him, he replied, “Too much sensory input. I’ve gotten so used to not having to be on the ‘swivel’ all the time. The odds of getting hit by a car where we live are practically nil. There are nuts in every crowd, but in larger populations, there are that many more nuts, many of them driving around.”

This last observation derived, ironically enough, from a recent experience in which I was driving (and Don was in the passenger seat) on a dark, unfamiliar, winding rural highway. Two pickup trucks, both driving at high speeds, crowded up against my backside and tailgated me aggressively, even though I couldn’t go any faster and they couldn’t pass because of the curves. The moment they had the chance, both roared by me and even tried to outpace each other. They were out of sight within moments. It was a few minutes of sheer danger and stupidity caused by two dangerous and stupid drivers.

Now multiply these types of drivers in urban areas, and you get why Don now suffers from “poliphobia.”

I’m okay in cities, at least for now. I don’t like them any more than Don does, but at least I can drive in them without my blood pressure spiking. If an occasion calls where we both need to go to a city, I do the driving. If the occasion calls where an errand needs to happen in an urban environment, I’m the one who goes.

Frankly, I can see myself suffering from “poliphobia” at some point in the future. I’m not there yet, but I can see the warning signs on the horizon.

Poliphobia. The latest trendy medical self-diagnosis.