Top 10 Tips To Surve A Nuclear Winter

Nuclear Winter is in itself a theoretical concept; scientists believe that in the event of nuclear war, vast amounts of soot will be injected into the stratosphere and spread by winds across the planet, blocking out the sun and making the temperature plummet. Crops would wilt and die; animals would soon follow. The collapse of the food chain would lead to the extinction of the human race.

Nuclear Winter could last for years, or even decades; and while it exists, any humans who survived the nuclear war will find it impossible to reestablish civilization. The only way to ensure the survival of the human race, is to collect a manual of tips for surviving a nuclear winter.

This may sound like something of a bogus entry, given that it cannot easily be helped, but the question of who survives the initial nuclear explosions will be decided by nothing more so than geographical location. Estimates made during the 1960s indicated that should Russia launch a fully committed assault on the United States, between 100-150million people would be killed by the initial detonations – over two thirds of the population at that time. Major cities will be rendered totally inaccessible, both by the blast and by the radiation which would accompany it. All in all, if you live in a city, you are almost certainly doomed – but if you live in the countryside, you have at least a moderate chance of initial survival.

This entry (and picture) may be somewhat controversial, but there are many solid reasons why religious beliefs could hinder the efforts of a potential nuclear war survivor. First of all, going to church every Sunday isn’t really priority number one after a nuclear holocaust. On a more serious note: in order to survive, you may have to perform acts which many religious (or simply moral) individuals would consider unthinkable (See #8). The survivor’s mindset must be decidedly Machiavellian: the world is now a free-for-all; issues of morality are secondary to staying alive by any means necessary.

If your religion bars you from eating certain foods, you may want abandon such dietary commitments and eat whatever you can find. Perhaps to help you abandon your faith, you might adopt the mindset that God (or any other deity) would have prevented a collapse of civilisation from occurring in the first place, if he/she really existed.

So you’ve survived the initial blast, and now you’re a country-dwelling atheist. What next? Well, consider for a moment your pets. Pets need food, water, and care – and there won’t be much loving going around during a nuclear winter. You aren’t going to survive long if every morsel of food is divided between you and Rex.

Those of a cold-hearted disposition may want to think about executing and devouring their pet(s), given that food will be extremely scarce. Most people however, will (I hope) find such thoughts revolting – so simply releasing the beloved animal into the wild may be a less sociopathic option. But in all seriousness, nuclear winter survivor: give up any hope of rescuing your goldfish. Small animals may as well just be disposed of, rather than consumed for sustenance – it will at least save them from a slow starvation in the future.

Time for some science: in the event of multiple nuclear warheads detonating over major cities, vast amounts of soot and dense smoke from the resultant fires would rise into the stratosphere, preventing sunlight from reaching much of Earth’s surface for years or even decades.

Surface temperatures would drastically decrease, and sub-zero conditions would be maintained indefinitely. In other words, the need for warm clothing cannot be understated – so you may want to scavenge some insulating coats if you don’t possess any already. Sadly, the perpetually freezing conditions aren’t the end of your worries; scientists have hypothesized a massive depletion of the ozone layer, meaning vast amounts of ultra-violet radiation would seep to the surface of the planet, causing deaths from skin cancer. Minimize these problems by avoiding sleeping out in the open, and always wear some kind of hood to shield the face from the bitter cold and the harmful UV rays.

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