Alien Prequel Reboot - David Cronenberg to direct - set in Satanic New York, London, Paris, Munich...

a couple of weeks ago, I came up with the amazing (or so I thought) Forget Prometheus post, it was a chucklesome yarn of pre-historic giger-man in the Garden of Eden.

It was all right and kinda served an exculpatory purpose but since then, I’ve got OBSESSED with the idea that, “If only David Cronenberg had been offered the Alien Sequel or Alien Prequel.” you know rather than Aliens or Prometheus having been made, respectively.

Had Giger’s people put the artist together with Cronenberg’s people in the 1980′s we might have got something that was more related to the Giger paintings’ ethos of biogeometry derived from visceral sexual union.

And it might have been the SAVING GRACE of the Alien Franchise (you know, were it not left to James Cameron (who I respect as an action film-maker) totally ruining the xenomorph concept with the addition of an (unnecessary) Alien Queen to the mix (gosh, I love my nested parentheses (and I can count))) had someone like Cronenberg taken up the reigns of the wild Alien prequel/sequel.

Here’s another aspect that Cameron et al have TOTALLY MISSED, the glaringly-obvious Satanic motifs in Giger’s work. The XENO-DEVIL AMONG US aspect … though I’m not sure if this would have translated to the Xenomorph Egg-mogrifying scenario of an Alien +/- (BA and AA i.e Before Alien or After Alien) but let’s have a go. Organised Satanists, Institutionalised Child Stealers and Ludicrous Blood Ritualists all happen today, in the modern world. An ‘homage to the rich’ takes place in global alter-theatres like The Shard and Trade Tower One. It’s about a parallel world being accessible at the point of these insane and corporatised rituals. Think EYES WIDE SHUT-ish. Think I-ching stargates opening in groups of three three three…

So, the portal opens up and we get a glimpse of Gigerworld, all constructed from living UGM or Universal Giger Matter … and it has a plethora of ‘demons’ and ‘shapeshifters’ and ‘space jockeys’ and such, meddlers with the laws of physics. Humans and Gigerbeasts interact, forming and reforming like oil on water. Gigerworld is exactly the same size as our world and has exactly the same number of xenos of all flavour, seven billion.

There must be something about Earth that only allows one-directional flow of energy between the two worlds, from ours to theirs. I don’t know, tie it in with the activity of the sun if you want, maybe it’s just a question of balance, call the film Tipping Point if you want.

Well, our plucky narrator who could be played by Logan Marshall Green ‘crosses over’ into Gigerworld where we see that hooded Accolytes who have offered themselves up for incorporation in Gigerworld are up to all sorts of no good, kinda Dante’s hell-ish, and they’re all ending up egg-mogrified. That same someone learns of the Xeno-invasion, maybe from a strong female type played by Noomi Rapace who pursues him sexually, and he concocts a plan of sacrifice by wading into the Gigery maelstrom himself and blending with Gigerworld where he traces the hyperspacer, our Space Jockey, who’s been tasked with delivering the eggs to Earth. He stops the Big Invasion of Earth and causes the Alien juggernaut to manifest on LV-426, landing softly in the duststorm. How many eggs were in the original juggernaut? And could there have been a flotilla explosion in Deep Space when the rest of them were killed?

Cut back to Space Jockey’s chest starting to creak open as our friend LMG emerges … and then staggers out into a silica storm where he is torn to (literally) bits.