Welcome To Chaos!

Just got finished cleaning the house and suffering bad from writers block. Doing a book sounds easy but at least for me, is far from it. The publisher wants more of this, less of that, all the while you edit yourself crazy as well in the process! Write, hunt monsters, aliens, ghosts, and all things paranormal. Some people think it’s a switch that you turn and off at will. Mine has never worked so it must be broken. More often than not chaos ensues.

See I’ve never been good with excess time as I bore so easy. I’ll work like a madman and go without food rest, and sometimes even bathing as gross as that sounds. I love chaos and it it was in human female form, and could cook….pass me the ring and lets tie the knot! Mistress Chaos has be wonderful for me and I doubt I could live long without her with me. It’s those times when she’s gone that the boredom devil takes control and pity all around me. Scary really……

When you travel and work in this line, many things suffer. Relationships strain both in the personal and business side most often to the breaking point. You learn to live without that comfort circle that most have. This is where one must entertain ones self.

Not too long ago, on the road with some down time, nothing no hotel cable and breeders with screaming demons in the pool I went for a walk. Bad idea……….There’s this box store that’s found (bet you can guess), everywhere so why not go in. Nothing was going on except in my head. Eleven o’clock on a Monday evening is not a high traffic time for these places in desert areas it seems. Now all this being said I’m no vandal so if I break something I’ll pay for it. This will cost me a bottle of ketchup for under three dollars. See a trail was made leading to the women’s fitting room and causing a puddle under the door. Well this is a fall hazard so it’s only right to inform an employee at once. You would have thought a horse had been slaughtered will all the red faces and the choking and gaging! The best bottle of 3 dollar ketchup ever! I wonder if they remember me

Farting almost at will is also a talent I possess and use quite often. Go ahead and call it crude. It may be but it’s priceless funny! I like to go to the meat section and let one go. I’ll walk away while it deploys and then go back. Go up to the first person in the section and look for meat. Then inquire if this isle has a bad smell. You guess it, they gone! Now this one I’m sorry for in a way. We go to the parking lot to get in the ride. Go up to the driver’s side door, place the key in and let one rip in the great wide open. Thunder it did, with a smell that would make a goat puke. I did not see the lady in the car next to me with the window down. Point blank range….It must have been like being sprayed by a skunk or pepper spray as her face was so red it would have fried an egg……..rotten eggs at that.

Well break has been good but I must be about. Just wanted to share a bit of humor as crude as it may be. I did warn in the tittle so if you were expecting normal, well, that bus doesn’t stop here!