They're Here!
My daughter and I went through the McDonald’s driveway window and I gave the cashier a $5 bill.
She said, ‘you gave me too much money.’
I said, ‘Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar coin back.’
She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request.
I did so, and he handed me back the 25c, and said ‘We’re sorry but we don’t do that kind of thing.’
The cashier then proceeded to give me back 75 cents in change.
Do not confuse the people at MacD’s.
***************
We had to have the garage door repaired.
The repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a ‘large’ enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, ‘You need a 1/4 horsepower.’
I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, ‘NOOO, it’s not. Four is larger than two.’
We haven’t used that repairman since…
*******************************
I live in a semi rural area.
We recently had a new neighbor call the local city council office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road.
The reason: ‘Too many deers are being hit by cars out here! I don’t think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.’
**********************************
My daughter went to a Mexican fast food and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for ‘minimal lettuce.’
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.
**********************************
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked,
‘Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?’
To which I replied, ‘If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?’
He smiled knowingly and nodded, ‘That’s why we ask.’
***************************
The pedestrian light on the corner beeps when it’s safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with an ‘intellectually challenged’ co-worker of mine.
She asked if I knew what the beeper was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, ‘what on earth are blind people doing driving?!’
She is a government employee…..
*******************************
When my husband and I arrived at a car dealership to pick up our car after a service, we were told the keys had been locked in it.
We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver’s side door.
As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
‘Hey,’ I announced to the technician, ‘its open!’
His reply, ‘I know. I already did that side.’
STAY ALERT!
They walk among us, they breed, and they vote…….
NESARA- Restore America – Galactic News
Source: http://nesaranews.blogspot.com/2016/02/theyre-here.html
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Whistler Blowers, Insiders
Great Post.
Unfortunately, just a sign post of how dumed down our society is and how easy it will be to get them to take a mark
of allegiance to a person or system.
LMAO, those were hilarious, welcome to the Twilight Zone
My Mother makes me crack up laughing sometimes but she has a very good excuse, she’s getting on in years
Last week I said to her I was struggling to read the small writing in the newspaper
and she said “You better go to the Vets soon or you’ll lose your hearing”
, God Bless
Years ago, my father had a large copy of the famous “Earth Rise” photo of the Earth taken from an Apollo mission proudly hanging on the wall. When I said something like, “What a great photo that is”, my ditzy step mother quipped, “That’s not a photo, it’s a painting.” Wondering where she was in 1970, I said no, it is indeed the famous photo of the Earth taken from the moon. With her hands on her hips, in all seriousness, she snorted, “How would they get cameras on the moon?”
True story.
How would they get photographic film there and back without it being ruined by (1) radiation produced by cosmic ray impacts, including gamma rays (2) x rays produced by electrons in the Van Allen belts (3) x rays produced by solar wind electrons (4) solar neutrons.
The Skylab space station, protected somewhat from cosmic rays and solar wind, and located well below the Van Allen belts, still had a lead-lined vault for photographic film.
How would they get astronauts through the Van Allen belts? Nobody has even pretended to do that in 44 years.
After 11 failed attempts, the Soviets soft-landed an unmanned Luna probe, for the first time, in 1966. Look at the (electronic not photographic) pictures.
You see rubble. Not wet sand. Rubble. And very harsh one-source light. Rocks hit by sunlight are very bright. What is not very bright is totally black.
Compare that to the soft light and sand that holds prints, in the (shot on a stage) Surveyor and Apollo pictures.
Look at the Apollo astronauts supposedly on the Moon. The sand is nearly as bright as their white space suits. In reality, the Moon absorbs about 90% of the light that strikes it, and it should look black by comparison.
The pictures are provably fake, many different ways. They are not even good fakes, because NASA knows most folks won’t look closely or think.
Currently it is a full moon during the day time in Eastern USA. Go out tomorrow and look at it and note the blue sky shining through some areas that you say should be black,a week from now see if you see a black surface where the shadow should be you will see the sky shining through the shaded area again. Test your own eyes
Maybe also post any number of comments made on BIN articles.. Focusing on just a few names in particular would expedite the search. haha……
Yes, and it looks like if all of them are members of some secret cult, so one moron will push hard to bring in another in same job (area), today it’s difficult to find person with IQ above 100.
Set the bar high why don’t you. Cool beans.
WAY TOO FUNNY.
It almost hurt to laugh this much.
Thanks…NESARA!
I once had an American ask me how deep do you have to go to swim under the island (Bermuda)
Like it was floating about in the Atlantic Ocean
, I think he was a Banker
You can find a lot of them in High Government Positions.
LMAO! These are too funny. I gotta add mine! Last week my cell phone died….kept saying “no service”. I call the carrier on my home phone. He tells me he is going to send a signal to my cell phone….and asked me to hang up and call back after the signal has gone through. I asked him why he wanted me to hang up? He said because you can’t be on the phone when the signal comes through. I then reminded him I’m not talking to him on the cell phone because it had “NO SERVICE!”.
“Po white trailer trash and them peoples what luvs ‘em” ! You’ve gotta love it ! I think these idiots are called Liberal DIM-o-crats aren’t they ? !!!!
And we wonder where democrats come from…..
The Democrats came out from under a rock, but the Republicans slithered out of the slime of the sea.
Both parties are corrupt and need to be abolished.
The ‘Elite’ own the Democrat and Republican parties and use them as a tool to pit Americans against each other.
To keep Americans from joining together as an American family and coming against the real villains … THEM.
VOTE FOR ARTICLE V IF ON THE BALLOT IN YOUR STATE
Yup ! Two heads of the SAME damn serpent !!!
Not only that they also run our government, own all the billion dollar corporations and run our lives. Wake up people
Those remind me of Pink Slime…idiot!
Yeah, I know they are here already
They have one here as their leader. Get this? They call him “president” LOL!
The DUNCES have taken over.
HA HA,
fater lots of talk about Aermogardens and Wars, these jokes are GOOD
Am American was heard getting of the train at my home city Durham shouting ‘hey, look at the little church on the hill’. We laughed. Pic of that little church – http://www.visitbritainblog.com/blog/2015/07/10/see-it-for-yourself-11-durham-cathedral/
All good humoured and no offence meant, we welcome our American cousins to our beautiful little city in North East England.
A person was hired to be a probation officer.
Quit four days later because she didn’t think she would actually have to have personal contact with them