“The path isn’t a straight line; it’s a spiral. You continually come back to things you thought you understood and see deeper truths.” ~ Barry H. Gillespie
An evolving soul will often come back time and again to certain themes or lessons. The experience of having to revisit certain types of things is one that can be quite frustrating for anyone who is committed to their self-awareness process.
Because we often subconsciously see our awakening journey as a race to the finish line type of path, we may feel as though we don’t have to re-visit soul lessons that we think we have already pushed past. To come back to something we think we have already been through is seen as a setback in the eyes of our goal-oriented ego.
However, an expanded level of consciousness shows us that a linear process is not in fact the case. So why do so many people find themselves attracting the same types of people, places and things over and over?
Why is it that we find it in our hearts to forgive ourselves or others, only to find ourselves in a very similar situation months later, inciting the same anger we thought we had already healed?
In order to understand this aspect of our spiritual process we must first understand the dynamics of an un-integrated ego and the awakening consciousness (our soul) that is beginning to rise within us. As our consciousness grows it begins to intermingle with the ‘intact’ ego and this is how confusion ensues.
Our ego knows that the light of our growing awareness means it’s ultimate demise, so it begins to grasp anything to stay alive. One of these desperate attempts to stay relevant, is the grasping on to spiritual ‘concepts’ and turning them into fear based belief systems that we can judge ourselves by.
The concept of achieving ‘perfection’ or of being completely ‘healed’ is one particular favorite of many spiritual seeker’s ego. Since the ego thrives in duality and judgment, the idea that we aren’t quite perfect, healed, enlightened enough or integrated enough is a belief that gives our ego a project to work on, thus giving it life.