The National Mustard Museum in Middleton has fallen on some grainy times, but that doesn’t mean that it’s ready to sell its mustard-soul. Last month, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) heard about the museum’s financial difficulties and offered to buy ad space at the museum to display a photo of a sexy “Lettuce Lady” pleading with museum patrons to try veggie dogs. PETA says that it would “hate to see that delicious mustard slathered on waist-expanding, artery-clogging meat,” and that it would rather see it slathered on tubes filled with icky vegetables.

The museum has its 20th anniversary next month, and while it would relish the opportunity to take PETA’s money, it declined, saying that it doesn’t want to risk putting an image in the museum “that could be potentially offensive to a lot of people.”

Adding, “if there’s going to be a smear campaign, it’s going to be smearing mustard on the food of your choice.” Puns!