Real Emotional Intelligence Matters

I’ve often felt that real emotional intelligence is about ‘caring’ and that all humans have that trait within them – sometimes you just have to pull it out or discover it.

One method I have used over the years on connecting with caring people is this.  When I share scary news with someone I know by email (this is the equivalent of being vulnerable), for example, I not only see how fast they respond, but how they respond.  No response at all, well, that’s real emotional immaturity.  A response that ignores the elephant on the table and barely goes there is emotional shallowness.  But I must say that it works every time.  The more I have dealings with the person who didn’t respond or didn’t go there, the more I realize they don’t have real emotional intelligence or a caring nature.  Not someone I would want on my team.

Obviously no one wants to drop bad news on anyone, especially people you don’t know well, but you can use this same technique by sharing any information that requires someone to think deeply and think through what you have just shared.  How do they respond?  

In this article, Marcel Schwantes provides 4 clues to help you identify someone with real emotional intelligence.  Working with a team that possesses these traits will lead to immense success.