Doctrinal Transparency

By: Kevin Henderson
Layperson Capital Life Church Arlington, VA

Over the past couple of years my wife and I have been on somewhat of a spiritual journey together. It started when I got bitter at my old Church in Portland, Oregon after watching “Paul Washers Shocking Youth Message.” All I can say is it’s like a song. The song can be terrible, but the performance and conviction of the singer can get you to move your body and dance to the tone. Well, I danced to the tone and became bitter towards the leaders in my church for not preaching the Gospel. I started trying to dress more “Baptist-y,” if that’s even a word. Slacks and a button up. I spent so much time listening to Paul Washer and many other reformed preachers. As a matter of fact, 95% of my books became Calvinistic. Spurgeon will always remain close to my heart.

 During this time my wife and I uprooted from Portland and moved to Arlington, Virginia. We went to a few churches in the first couple of months in the area. We went to several Charismatic Churches, but the preachers I had been listening to condemned such churches. I couldn’t humble myself. I wanted to seem like a deeply theological Baptist, or what I pictured one being. We finally ended up going to this small fellowship – a Reformed Southern Baptist Church. We soon became members and I think that any Christian would agree with their statement of faith. Calvinism, or any of the 5 points, was not brought up. I understood that the church leaders were Calvinists, but they never talked about what that meant. I remained ignorant to much of the doctrine.

 Over the three years that I was a church member there I had lunch with the pastor often. During these lunches I would always bring up evangelism and how to reach the unsaved. As a spiritual man, I look for what the enemy is doing to keep men in their unbelief. One such lunch discussion I remember as clear as day. I had told my pastor, “When evangelizing, I wonder what’s hindering them.” He replied with a genuine twinkle in his eye, “You know why.” Well I didn’t know why and I definitely didn’t know why he was so cheery about it. He then opened up to me about the “reprobate doctrine.”

 The “reprobate doctrine” is that the mass of humanity was born salvificly hated by God, determined for Hell, with no hope for salvation. It shocked me that rather than breaking his heart, it made him smile. On top of that, I found out the depth of his limited atonement doctrine. This meant that Christ did not die for the sins of the whole world, but only for the sins of the “elect.” Now that doctrine really got to me because I never preach the Gospel without telling the person that Jesus died for their sins, which is the core of the Gospel.

 I did not leave the Church right away. In fact, I spent three months going through the Bible with my pastor to show him that “limited atonement” cannot be true and that no one has to remain a reprobate. This is because God desires the salvation of all people. However, he wouldn’t change his tradition even in light of Scripture. My wife and I left that Church because of these doctrines. I believe that about 70% of the people in the pews would also leave if they were open about the reprobate doctrine and especially limited atonement. I felt really deceived. I also feel like the whole congregation is being deceived because these extremely important doctrines are not on the church’s statement of faith. They also don’t explain the TULIP to their members even though all the elders and head pastor are 5 point Calvinist

 After leaving, I felt a large weight had been lifted off of me. I also found that I had an abundance of grace for my charismatic brothers who were just trying to be like Jesus and get people saved. Rather than being critical about them again I have repented. In doing so I have felt so free in the Spirit of God. Charismatics are starting to get deeper into the study of the Word and I think Traditionalism, Connect316, and SBCToday will start helping Charismatics like myself look deeper into theology.