Economic Heebie-Jeebies

by Richard Daughty * Gold Seek 

It was, alas, one of those “good news/bad news” kind of week, in that my natural hostility and paranoid towards the monetary insanity of the Federal Reserve did not boil over in some pointless, screaming outburst of outrage.

Hmmm. “Outburst of outrage.” Not bad writing! See? It was THAT kind of week!

On the bad news side, having drawers full of old electronic things lying about, I somehow hit on the doomed-but-desperate plan to assemble some kind of transmitter with which to contact my home planet, wherever that is, by randomly soldering odd pieces of miscellaneous circuit boards together.

The theory is based on the famous Mogambo One Chance In Hell Theory (MOCIHT), which postulates that even the slimmest chance is better than no chance at all. Ergo, it is theoretically possible that I might accidentally construct, quite by lucky accident, a working transmitter, and people back on my planet will hear me and send a spaceship to rescue me, and return me to a safe, solid, predictable place where the money is gold, which is a clever monetary device whereby the money supply is constrained so that inflation in the money supply never happens, and thus is a wonderful place where the absolutely miserable horrors of price inflation and systemic economic collapse never happen, and where everyone is happy, happy, happy and sublimely contented, where life goes peacefully on, and you can get a nice little nap anytime you want without kids running noisily through the house or some stupid neighbor mowing his stupid lawn.

The bad news in that regard is that, beyond some surprising, yet interesting and colorful, electrical fires, with lots of sizzling and sparking and acrid, choking smoke, nothing. Zilch.

On the “good news” side, during my now apparently-extended stay on this crazy planet, so bereft of common sense in that it has willingly and deliberately destroyed itself with fiat currencies unconnected to gold, I have something to read.

I received a copy of NOJMR Doug’s new book, Economica Mogambo, which is an edited collection of Mogambo Guru newsletters, yet subtitled “The Desk Reference,” which really made me laugh! Hahaha! And it’s like that all the way through!

And starting on page 289 are the contents of the “Fun Facts” section of MogamboGuru.com, all of which are funny and/or witty epigrams, written by funny and clever people that I don’t even know and actually never saw before, such that these pithy little gems made me laugh out loud, and thus may be worth the price of the whole book right there!

And in another dub-index of the book, I was delighted to find that I had invented the delightful acronym FLOES, which stands for Free Lunch On Easy Street, which is obviously just an update on Bastiat’s “everyone trying to live at the expense of everyone else.”

Unfortunately, as clever as I think that acronym is, I am embarrassed to realize that it only worsens by embarrassment in proving, once again, that I never have an original thought, and my critics are all correct, and I really AM a Big Stupid Mogambo (BSM).

Just in time to rescue me from deepening depression, there is, I am happy to say, offsetting good news! But only if you are a paranoid, angry, Austrian school of economics gold-bug like me, who is absolutely convinced that investing precious dollars into anything except gold and silver, given the dire current economic facts AND the lessons of the last 2,500 years of monetary and fiscal history, is beyond stupid, and that only really, really, REALLY stupid people could possibly think that the absurdity of massive deficit-spending, per the laughably ridiculous Keynesian theory and practice currently in vogue, could possibly, ever, in a million years, end up anywhere except in Total Freaking Disaster (TFD).

The good news in that? You can easily turn this Priceless Mogambo Gem Of Investing Advice (PMGOIA) into cold, hard cash! “How?” you ask?

The clue is found in Dan Cofall’s eponymous Cofall Letter, where, according to his “Back of the envelope” calculations, figures that “By most accounts, less than 170,000 tons of gold have been mined… in history. 5B ounces. $7T at current market value. How much is sitting at ocean’s bottom in an unsalvageable wreck? How much adorns houses of worship around the world? How much is held that will never be sold? How much is in electronics currently in use?”

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