Greetings to all, we are glad you are here and hope this finds you well, and in good spirit. I would like to expound on our guest writer’s article: “The Difference Between Advice and Encouragement”, in a way that you can begin to see it in action, from a daily relationship, and how we all either create an upside-down world, or a right-side-up world, based on the outcome of our daily decisions, thoughts, actions (the big and little ones) and what effect they have on our lives, and all those around us.
Many years back I began to imagine being married to a man who was a good man, who would be the leader in the family and take good care of me and his family; something I had not been able to experience in this life at that time, but now realize, I was not a spiritually feminine lady, at that time, and that was why. I dreamed of having a relationship where harmony worked to create a much more peaceful and productive environment, than I was living in at the time. I began by loving myself first, and, as the dream unfolded, I starting to face the obstacles of my past actions and decisions of allowing myself to be used, abused, becoming co-dependent, independent, bossy, etcetera, that had been preventing me from realizing my dream. By first taking an honest look at myself, and what position in the game of life I had chosen, which helped to created the chaos and disharmony in the first place, I faced my fears of not being loved. Knowing this was no way to live, I made a tough decision. Relying on this new knowing I set healthier boundaries, changed body-language and welcomed the change, accepting that this was right and that the dream would be fulfilled. Up until this point in my life all that me, myself, and I, had accomplished was hurting myself, others, and creating an “upside-down world.”
We have all heard the old saying, “love makes the world go ’round” (not sex), contrary to what we all have been taught by today’s upside-down society; sex and Love are not one in the same. Sex without love makes you feel worthless, used and abused. Love points us to The Ruler of The Universe, because He is LOVE. Acknowledging that He created and successfully runs the entire Universe, we should be able to trust Him to teach us how to become good and love one another. Women, if you offer a Real Man sex before marriage he will see this as a big turn off, instead of turn on, and will view you as promiscuous and untrustworthy. If you dress for sex, exposing a lot of skin, tight jeans and low neck tops, etcetera, then your body-language will most likely attract a man who has one thing on his mind, and it is not in either of your best interests. On the other hand, when you become spiritually feminine you will dress demure and feminine, learning how to attract the love of a real man, and enjoy the essence of True love, which you will deserve and enjoy. The wealth of becoming spiritually feminine is obtainable for all women. It is priceless, and I encourage each of you to seek after this special gift, if you don’t already possess it, and are actively practicing it every day. For the most part, our world turns right-side-up, by me being humble and teachable, always asking for my husband’s guidance, because ultimately he Rules over me and has the final decisions on everything. I have learned that my husband is still learning how to be spiritually mature, and makes mistakes too; this is a learning process for both of us. When this happens it is my responsibility to support him in his growth, and encourage him to correct his wrongs according to God’s Commandments, which will reflect his behavior back to him, making this conflict between him and God alone. By doing what is right, we ensure that God will be on our side, providing and protecting us through our husbands, as promised. By acting non-manipulative and submissive you will take yourself out of the conflict, helping him more than if you argue about who is right or wrong, or try to convince a man with Satan’s advice, like Eve did to Adam, which only leads to discord in the relationship. Hopefully, you are now beginning to “see” that by acting spiritually feminine, you have a far greater effect on the relationship. If we want to live a joyful, healthy life, it is important to put God first and foremost in all aspects of our lives, by following His perfect Laws. By doing so, you fall under His promised blessings, where He will never let you down and you will never feel alone. You will always receive His unconditional LOVE, when and IF you are ready to receive it. As we ALL have been told, “Father knows best”, so it seems that The 10+2 Command-ments are a perfect guide, that everyone should follow when making decisions, and taking action, on a daily basis. The word Command-ments means commanded to obey, and they were given to us with our best interest in mind.
A mutual friend, who introduced my husband and I, had been trying for a while to get me to agree to meet him, so she shared many things about him, like his talents and pictures of him, but the one thing that really sparked my interest, because I was not interested in his looks and another bad relationship, was the fact he did not work on the Sabbaths (Saturday) for money. She said he would help people out on that day, if need be, but never charge for it. This made my decision to allow her to give him my number. He later shared with me, that prior to us meeting, while on vacation, he had cried out to God at the top of the mountain, accepting the fact that God had not placed the right woman in his life, accepting instead the solitary life he had been living with God, which he had done for over seven years. When he returned he saw her message, and he waited a while, to be sure he was supposed to call me. After nearly a week, he called me, and that’s when I asked him about his relationship with Christ. Based on his answer, I had some trust in him, before actually meeting in person, publicly, and was now looking for his actions to line up with his words. He invited me to meet him for dinner one Sunday evening. Before ordering I mentioned I might have a beer, which I didn’t, because the thought of finding a man who truly wanted to serve God was important to me, and I did not want to run him off. He kindly replied with compassion in his voice, “Is that what you think you need to be doing with your life?” Although I had drunk alcohol almost every day, up until I met him, that evening was when I stopped drinking. I have never had another drink since, and now I see how I was testing him, to see if he was for real, and he sure was. He suggested we study together on The Sabbaths, which I enjoyed, because he read God’s Holy Word to me, and that is when my desires for alcohol, materialism, sex, vanity, money, power, etcetera began to diminish, and for the first time I felt satisfied inside. The truth is alcohol dissolves our inhibitions to abstain from sinful behaviors. Prior to meeting him, I did not want to drink, but had not been able to stop, even though I had attended church and 12 step meetings.
As the relationship grew, I could see his words lined up with his actions, as he stood firm in his beliefs. He exercised his manhood establishing healthy boundaries for our relationship. One of the greatest demonstration of his love and respect for our Creator, himself and me was when he informed me of his wishes for us to stay out of bed, insisting on saying our marriage vows to God and each other first, and then consummating our marriage on the honeymoon, thereby obeying the First Commandment to Love God first. I agreed, knowing this would take great self-control on both our parts, and we both faithfully kept our word to God and each other. As a result, he surprised me with a white rose, dipped in gold, on our honeymoon night, as a gift/symbol celebrating our purity together. Another way he did not over-step his boundaries with me, was when he knelt down to ask if he could kiss me for the first time, which touched my heart deeply and proved he was a gentleman. I liked this way of creating our world/thinking and felt the true love, that his actions were proving between us. With his masculine love and good examples, I now had hope, a sense of security, which made me feel loved and cherished, as our love grew stronger. Have you ever heard this saying? “YOU are your own worst enemy.” That is the Truth, and until we face these facts our egos will defeat us every time, keeping us from attracting and falling in love with a real man.
Learn to take action, change behaviours and set boundaries, so this kind of man will seek you out, and then you will be able to learn that your greatest power lies in your willingness to be guided by a real man. I faced-down my ego and learned to look to him for everything, especially strength and courage to continue to follow him, and this new way of learning to love each other, that he was teaching me.
When we first started dating, he had been working on a single woman’s residential home for quite a while, and he told me he needed to get finished with it, and move on to others. So he asked me to help him with the work one day, which set the foundation for him to train me to be his help-meet. It was during this time that he would repeat a saying that I did not fully understand, but was willing to learn. He kept repeating it, sometimes on a daily basis, “familiarity breeds contempt”. At the time I was learning how to recognize my feelings and behaviors more, with a sober mind now, a gut feeling if you will, a knowing, and trusting in this guidance. The more he would say this quote, the more I understood and put it into action, being careful to keep our healthy boundaries each day, striving to always be courteous, greeting each other with a kiss and a hug, being polite, putting the needs of others first, before my self, and learning when conflict came, to still do the same.
Through these acts of selflessness the love continued to grow, and I began to understand how to let him lovingly guide me, as our hours turned into days. The time flew by and my world started turning right-side-up. At the time we met, I had also been attending organized religion for years, but when I ask my new best friend to go with me, he said he could not do that, knowing the truth about those organizations, stating, instead, that Christ’s sacrifice on the cross had abolished the priesthood, for all
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