Am I supposed to be suffering?

I read stories all over the internet and in print about people who are suffering from, a victim of, or a survivor of some ailment I have. I do not consider myself to be suffering, a victim of, or a survivor of any damn thing. I am just living.

I do have a new ailment…. Oh joy. But its not that exciting to me. Its called… drum roll…. are  you ready…. well…. its…. dry eyes. See, its not exciting just like I said it wasn’t and I probably blogged about it before. But its just another little pain in the ass thing in my life. A sign that my body continue to fall apart at an amazing rate. Dry eyes don’t sound that bad but can lead to long term problems…. But they do not cause suffering or ailing or victimization.

And I get to get another medication with an advertising program – Restasis. This is the one with the perky ophthalmologist who is also a patient… Its right up there with a marketing budget probably the same amount as Lyrica which is single handedly increasing the worth of a couple companies by the amount comparable to the GDP of some countries…

The annual cost for Restasis at retail is $3800. Lyrica is a paltry $3000 a year. What kills me about Restasis is the ophthalmologist told me that Restasis comes in little single use vials which contain about 10 drops each and you are supposed to use one vial in the morning and put a drop in each eye and then toss it and use a second vial at the end of the day. Little plastic vials that need to go in recycling and I hope do not end up floating around in the oceans. The doctor said that I can use each vial for both morning and night so I can stretch it for twice as long. But seriously little plastic vials in this day and age? These could make me suffer itself.

Well even if I gave a new ailment, I don’t feel like I’m ailing. But then I never feel like I’m ailing. I just don’t. Ailing is a word out of a nineteenth century novel where the heroine is reclining after a stressful afternoon tea or childbirth.

I certainly am not surviving anything more than a boatload of doctor appointments as I have said many times before. I just keep adding to the list of doctor appointments.

But I clearly am not suffering. Never have and never will. Unless its a hangnail or a splinter. Or over annoyance over single use plastic vials.