The answer is" when it isn't fun anymore"....

People ask all kinds of questions all day long. I asked myself a question a few months ago and the answer of whether to continue forward, or take another path came down to the same answer you can supply for just about anything. The words may have to be adjusted a little , but basically you know it is time to move on when it isn’t fun anymore.

This applies to hobbies, jobs, friends, partners, businesses, and even where you live. There should be an amount of pleasure in all of these things, some more than others, but they all have to have that “fun” or “pleasure” factor, or else it becomes a chore, drudgery, stressful and upsetting. There is no need to add any of those things to life. Now please do not tell me how you can’t afford your dream house, so you live in a place you hate. There are not only places in between nirvana and hell, but it is in your power to change it. No one said it would be easy!

It isn’t always easy to walk away or make big changes. Sometimes a lot of time, energy and even money is invested. When we cannot find a new avenue however (remember the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results), to attack problems from, we have to walk away.

People think that walking away is a bad thing. It is desertion, it is giving up. It isn’t always that. “Giving up” only happens when you have NOT tried everything and have NOT done your best. When you have always given your all and things are not going right it is the Universe’s message to move on.

Sometimes things start out differently than they end up. You have high hopes and goals, and they get changed by circumstances, people or availability of money or time. Then the plans need to change and may change to a place where there is no pleasure.

I have a bad habit of making things better for people. That sounds like an oxymoron doesn’t it? Being a “fixer” is great until is gets to be your responsibility to fix and maintain, instead of your benevolence. “Help”, isn’t “help” if another person is not also working towards their goal with you. Then you can be enabling. I don’t mind helping, I love helping, but helping means others are participating. Sometimes I get in so deep and am watching what I am working on excel and improve, that it takes a bit for me to realize that the person I was helping is now sitting on the sidelines taking it easy (the reason they needed help in the first place). One of my lessons to learn.

The moral of the story is, if it isn’t fun anymore, don’t continue. My job is fun, even though there are days when it is frustrating, it still is fun. Every day doesn’t need to be a hoot for your life to be fun, but the scales need to be tipped in the right direction! My job is still fun, my marriage is a blast, my hobbies are fun, and my friends are fun. A little adjustment here and there every now and then doesn’t hurt, and I do make those adjustments.

Many fear change, and that is usually from the unknown. I don’t have a fear of the unknown, but a thirst for the knowledge of it,  to make it known. We are looking at finding a new home, one with more room, less maintenance and more “style”. A home we will buy together instead of the home I bought years ago.This will be a major change, and already there are major changes going on all around me. Life is taking off again, and now I have to go and catch up.

Change is good, it finds you new people , hobbies, challenges, and more fun.

Do it until it isn’t fun anymore, and while you are at it, do unto others……

Peshaui Wequashimese

(C)2013 Dr R M Wolf. May not be used, copied or reproduced without prior written permission.