Diogenes Goes Car Hunting

Diogenes  famously carried a lamp as part of his search  for an honest man. One can feel like Diogenes if you go looking for a used car.

For those wondering about the lack of a political column this weekend, it’s because our car got shellacked in a car accident we were involved in. Andrea had a minor concussion, but is getting better.  However, our car had its frame pretty well ruined, and it’d cost too much to fix.

Well, we’re off to search for a replacement car. And I saw something very promising on Craig’s list. It, like the last car was a Taurus, and it had this description:

Our 1992 Ford Taurus GL has a 3.0L V6 engine with 47K miles! This vehicle has suede interior, with a stereo, has power door locks, power windows, power mirrors, good sounds, A/C blow cold and works great! This vehicle also gets great gas mileage! And runs great!!!!

Well, this sounded like a pretty good car, so I hopped in my rental car and drove out to West Boise to find the car. Well, the outside looked worse than the Craig’s list picture, but I’ve never been averse to driving ugly cars. There was a smell inside the car, which I wondered if it would fade or not over time.

I headed down to Maz-tech, which was nearby.  As I drove, I could tell the car was not driving right. When I pulled up to Maz-tech, I turned the engine off and it wouldn’t come back on. So much for runs well.  And I also discovered the Power Doors didn’t work. As tempted as I was to drive the car back, I couldn’t. I decided to let the wizards at Maz-tech take a look and see what all was wrong with it.

Their report was amazing. The rear brakes were gone, the front brakes were 70 percent gone. Radiator hoses were starting to swell. Brake fluid was bad. Power steering was about gone. The air conditioning didn’t work. The ignition looked like it might fail. In essence, this “runs great” car was little more than a poorly painted death trap with a failing battery. There were so many problems, we had to laugh. The only thing truly accurate about the ad was that the radio worked.

After they finally got the car running, they advised that it would make it back to the dealer, but advised me not to turn the engine off for fear it would die. I arrived back at the dealer and informed them that the car had too many problems. They didn’t ask me to elaborate or share what was wrong. Though, the gentleman found out one of them when he went to start the car.

There’s an often unfair stereotype of car dealers as frauds. But there are  reasons for that stereotype, and I met one of them today.  The only reason I don’t share the name is because I honestly don’t know whether the place in question was dishonest or merely incompetent. Someone who sells you a car that breaks down after 50 miles may be trying to defraud you. Someone who tries to sell a car that breaks down after five miles may be either incompetent, either as a con artist or as someone who doesn’t know enough about cars to be selling them. For example, a Ford Taurus of that year actually only has five digits in its odometer rating, so it’s more than likely the engine had 147,000 miles on it (given the condition, that was more likely.)

If it there’s a moral to this story: It’s this. Always take a used car to a mechanic before purchasing it. You never know what might be wrong with it.

Read more at Adam’s Blog