Berkeley Entertains Using Moonbattery to Stop the Moonbattery

The moonbattery has been getting out of hand in Berkeley, with people unable to make speeches due to threats of continued leftist violence. Fortunately, the city has the right people in charge to apply a solution — provided the solution is more moonbattery:

It appears that several Berkeley Council members, including the Mayor, are subscribed to a Google group called “Occupy Bay Area Trainers”—the relics of Occupy Wall Street movement in the area.

In an email chain, received by multiple council members and the Mayor, City of Berkeley volunteer Commissioner Phoebe Anne Sorgen suggested starting a peace force to stop the violence with things like “bubbles” “singing,” and “laughter yoga”.

“Envision Wavy Gravy, bubbles, singing, laughter yoga! Occupella. Buddhist Peace Meditators. Fencing with sponge noodles,” she wrote. “Will Edwin set up the Empathy tent? How about a volleyball game in the middle of the park and/or a square dance? Will Code Pink pls bring peace symbol cookies to pass out, and daisies”.

Normally, you would assume this was snark. But we are talking about Berkeley. The Empathy Tent concept has already been used, at a U.C. Berkeley protest on April 27.

Sorgen went on to praise the Black Bloc anarchists responsible for most of the violence, even crediting these useless anarcho-communist freegan types with providing medics.

At this point, the most reasonable course of action would be to use Berkeley to test new weapons systems.

On a tip from Bodhisattva.