The Emotions Stored In An Old Table And Cultivating Memories

Walking In TheAlps, Austria

I sometimes find it odd how scientists bother to take time to prove the obvious.

A headline I saw in the Daily Mail stated: ‘If you want to be happy, spend your money making memories.’

It seems that a group of psychologists have carried out experiments to see what we talk about most from the significant purchases we have made. And guess what? We are more likely to talk about holidays and travel than material purchases such as new furniture and so on. Fancy that!

Bogart & Bergman

One of the researchers, Amit Kumar, from Cornell University in New York State, explained, “Experiences live on in our memories but our material goods ‘disappear’ as we get used to them. A once cherished Walkman is now obsolete but as Humphrey Bogart once told Ingrid Bergman: ‘We’ll always have Paris’.”

So that’s it. We should spend our money and time creating memories – who can argue with that?

But, there again, possessions can trigger memories. Take, for example, an old table we used to have in our dining room.

We had this from when Karin and I first got together and it wasn’t new then. We used to paint it, and the matching chairs, different colours as we changed the wallpaper and colour schemes of the room.

Once the children had left home we bought a new glossy, shiny table and chairs with a matching display cabinet but it’s not the same. It looks much nicer but it has no history, and there’s nothing much really to say about it. Ah but, with the old table, it’s different.

We didn’t get rid of the old table. It now resides in Karin’s dressmaking room and is a good size for when she lays out long lengths of material and, well, whatever else she does. But when I look at the table I think of laughter and a whole heap of memories.

Over the years we have laughed ourselves silly sitting round that table playing games, talking, eating celebratory meals and so on. I can remember teaching my son to read and singing songs to him like Old Shep while we sat there. My mum and dad, Karin’s mother and various friends and family have all joined us for meals, tea and laughter.

I can remember on occasions laughing so much I had to leave the room with tears running down my cheeks, but there have also been tears of great sadness as we lost various relatives, friends and animals.

All of this and so much more is locked away deep within the wood.

It’s a symbol of what our family has gone through: the happy and the sad, the trivial and the meaningful. It’s part of our history. So when people say that symbols and magic don’t exist they are way off course. If emotions have been involved whatever it is holds a special power. Even an old table.

Memories are what we are. Without them we don’t exist.

It’s time to cultivate.

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