Donald Trump was booed at the Al Smith Dinner last night — a fundraiser for Catholic charities helping children. Politicians often attend these dinners and tell self-deprecating jokes and point fun at their opponents. But at a certain point, Trump just wasn’t funny — and it hurt to watch.
Here’s the video of Trump’s remarks. The bad times begin around 9:59:
Here’s a transcript of where Trump started to run into trouble:
Now, I’m told Hillary went to confession before tonight’s event, but the priest was having a hard time, when he asked about her sins, and she said she couldn’t remember 39 times.
Hillary is so corrupt, she got kicked off the Watergate Commission.
How corrupt do you have to be to get kicked off the Watergate Commission? Pretty corrupt.
Hillary is, and has been, in politics since the 70s. What’s her pitch? The economy is busted? The government’s corrupt? Washington is failing? “Vote for me. I’ve been working on these problems for 30 years. I can fix it”, she says.
I wasn’t really sure if Hillary was going to be here tonight, because I guess you didn’t send her invitation by email. Or, maybe, you did and she just found out about it through the wonder of WikiLeaks.
We’ve learned so much from WikiLeaks. For example, Hillary believes that it’s vital to deceive the people by having one public policy —
— and a totally different policy in private. That’s okay. I don’t know who they’re angry at Hillary, you or I. For example, here she is tonight, in public, pretending not to hate Catholics.
Now some of you haven’t noticed, Hillary isn’t laughing as much as the rest of us. [Editorial note: nobody was laughing at this point.] That’s because she knows the jokes. And all of the jokes were given to her in advance of the dinner by Donna Brazile. Which is – everyone knows, of course, Hillary’s belief that it takes a village, which only makes sense after all in places like Haiti, where she’s taken a number of them.
The second he called her “corrupt,” this is the scene. Check the dude on the right side of the screen:
It was . . . awkward. I felt bad for Trump, the way you do when you watch any comic bomb. I didn’t think he was intending to be nasty, necessarily. The ethic at this thing is, you tell some jokes at your expense, and some at your opponent’s expense. Trump’s sin wasn’t so much that he was criticizing Hillary as that, at this particular moment, he wasn’t being funny. I wonder if maybe these were the jokes he had written for himself. I watched his entire performance — and hers too — and they both had some good lines written for them. Here are some of Trump’s that worked well:
And even tonight, with all of the heated back and forth, between my opponent and me at the debate last night, we have proven that we can actually be civil to each other. In fact, just before taking the dais, Hillary accidentally bumped into me and she very civilly said, “Pardon me.”
And I very politely replied, “Let me talk to you about that after I get into office.”
. . . .
You know, last night, I called Hillary a “nasty woman,” but this stuff is all relative. After listening to Hillary rattle on and on and on, I don’t think so badly of Rosie O’Donnell anymore.
These two were my favorites:
These events give not only the candidates a chance to be with each other in a very social setting; it also allows the candidates the opportunity to meet the other candidate’s team — good team.
I know Hillary met my campaign manager, and I got the chance to meet the people who are working so hard to get her elected. There they are — the heads of NBC, CNN, CBS, ABC — there’s the New York Times, right over there, and the Washington Post.
. . . .
Oh, this one’s going to get me in trouble.
Not with Hillary. You know, the president told me to stop whining, but I really have to say, the media is even more biased this year than ever before — ever. You want the proof? Michelle Obama gives a speech and everyone loves it — it’s fantastic. They think she’s absolutely great. My wife, Melania, gives the exact same speech —
— and people get on her case!
Those were genuinely funny, and people laughed. Hillary had some good lines written for her too — and while she delivered them in that annoying Hillary way, I still laughed at a few things:
And, Donald, after listening to your speech, I will also enjoy listening to Mike Pence deny that you ever gave it.
. . . .
Now, you notice there is no teleprompter here tonight, which is probably smart, because maybe you saw Donald dismantle his prompter the other day. And I get that. They’re hard to keep up with, and I’m sure it’s even harder when you’re translating from the original Russian.
. . . .
And look at this dais — we’ve got Charlie Rose, and Maria Bartiromo, and Chris Matthews, and Gayle King, and Nora O’Donnell, and Katie Couric — this counts as a press conference, right?
. . . .
There is nothing like sharing a stage with Donald Trump. Donald wanted me drug tested before last night’s debate. And look, I’ve got to tell you, I am so flattered that Donald thought I used some sort of performance enhancer.
Now, actually, I did. It’s called preparation.
. . . .
Now, look, I have deep respect for people like Kellyanne Conway. She’s working day and night for Donald and because she’s a contractor, he’s probably not even going to pay her.
Not everyone was amused. She told this joke about Rudy Giuliani
Now, many don’t know this, but Rudy actually got his start as a prosecutor going after wealthy New Yorkers who avoided paying taxes. But, as the saying goes, “If you can’t beat them, go on Fox News and call them a genius.”
Here was his reaction:
None of this is going to change anyone’s vote. Trump voters probably didn’t watch this — and if they hear that a bunch of elites in tuxes booed Trump, especially for criticizing Hillary, so much the better.