The Internet Demands the Armpit Hair of Social Justice for Imaginary Super Warrior Princess With Magic Lasso

While most people were obsessing over the Republicans making a hash of the Obamacare repeal, others were focused on more consequential matters, namely Wonder Woman’s armpit hair.

There’s a scene in the latest trailer for the upcoming movie that shows Wonder Woman with her arms raised above her head, revealing smoothly shaven pits. For some people this is a problem.

Just doing some pod-related Twitter searching, and until this point I hadn’t realised how badly I wanted Wonder Woman to have armpit hair.

— Joe Cunningham (@JoeCunningham14) March 16, 2017

No, not THAT Joe Cunningham. (I believe he said he prefers a Wonder Woman with sideburns and a soul patch.)

First-world feminism at it again, crying into pumpkin spice. https://t.co/IA3q7SVcaa

— Lucas Lynch (@lucasjlynch) March 24, 2017

Wonder Woman! A movie about a goddess made out of clay with a magic whip.
Internet: WHERE IS HER ARMPIT HAIR?! I can’t suspend my disbelief! pic.twitter.com/lrE2f3W3TA

— Blake Northcott (@ComicBookGrrl) March 21, 2017

Speaking of suspending disbelief, I think it’s important to note, that in the scene where Wonder Woman’s armpits are on full display, she is lifting a tank.

People upset about #Wonderwoman not having armpit hair because it isn’t realistic. SHE THROWS CARS AND FLIES.

— Patrick Gunn (@SonOfUhGunn) March 21, 2017

This is exactly my point. Thank you. She also stops bullets and has a magic lasso that compels people to tell the truth. Wrap anyone in that lasso and they will say, “She looks better without armpit hair,” even if they are currently making a public stink about its absence.

First female superhero film for 17 years and all the talk is about her armpits… #WonderWoman pic.twitter.com/MPXMERdi3S

— r.a.c.h.e.l t. (@racheltunnard) March 17, 2017

Why is everyone focused on just her armpits? If armpit hair would make her more authentic then what about her legs, her arms, her eyebrows? If you’re only going to demand hairy pits for social justice you’re a poser. Demand that she be sasquatched up from her unibrow all the way down to her hobbit feet. If she does not resemble Chaka from Land of the Lost, the patriarchy has won.

Me after seeing all those Wonder Woman armpit articles. pic.twitter.com/sHUqBfFvsm

— Mickey (@Stinggz) March 24, 2017

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