Re-align your chi with New Age Bulls**t Generator
“Do you want to sell a New Age product and/or service? Tired of coming up with meaningless copy for your starry-eyed customers? Want to join the ranks of bestselling self-help authors? We can help.”
That’s the promise made by Seb Pearce, creator of the New Age Bullshit Generator, and while it can’t be confirmed that anyone has made any amount of money on products or books with the aid of his quantum field of pure potentiality (to describe the Bullshit Generator in a New Age kind of way), it sure is a fun (and cheap… and lonely) way to spend a Saturday night—each click of the “Reionize electrons” button summons a brand new webpage full of quality, computer-generated entertainment.
Pearce drew inspiration for this project from a “philosophy debate binge,” and he details how the digital espouser of New Age poppycock came into being in a blog post. He explains on the Bullshit Generator’s homepage:
“After sitting through hours of New Age rhetoric, I decided to have a crack at writing code to generate it automatically and speed things up a bit. I cobbled together a list of New Age buzzwords and cliché sentence patterns and this is the result.”
According to Pearce’s blog post, his creation was mostly well-received, getting 50,000 views on Reddit in just four days. However, to any who were offended, Pearce writes: “Don’t worry. This is just a digital manifestation of the infinite being mocking itself through quantum pulses of energy. And who is the ‘I’ who is offended, anyway?”
We’d finish writing this article, but we suddenly feel compelled to just sit here and feel the energy of the universe cycling through us, so instead we’ll allow the New Age Bullshit Generator to finish writing it and to leave you with some valuable wisdom:
It is in evolving that we are recreated. It is time to take learning to the next level. Eons from now, we travellers will reflect like never before as we are guided by the infinite.
Turbulence is the antithesis of chi. Selfishness is born in the gap where rebirth has been excluded. We can no longer afford to live with desire. Although you may not realize it, you are dynamic. Have you found your circuit? Traveller, look within and awaken yourself. The network of serenity is now happening worldwide. It is a sign of things to come.
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Source: http://www.redorbit.com/news/technology/1113320967/re-align-your-chi-with-new-age-bullshit-generator-012615/
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