Compete, compete, compete - for what?

When You Don’t Win

by Paul Kowalewski

Yesterday I was in Los Angeles to make a presentation, and so we stayed overnight in the city. Just a few blocks from our hotel a host of glittering celebrities were hovering around, walking the “red carpet” and hoping to be one of the lucky recipients of a coveted “Oscar.”

While there were many excited winners last night, most of those people who walked that red carpet ended the evening disappointed and empty-handed. So the question I ask is what happens when you don’t win–not just on an Oscar night, but in life? What happens when you don’t win in life?

We are a very competitive society (at least this is true in Western culture) and the goal of competition is always to win. And so we think of losing or failing as somehow being shameful, disheartening and disappointing.

We also live in a society in which “perfection” is highly prized. Every day we are bombarded with images advertising beautiful people with perfect looks- perfect hair, perfect teeth and bodies selling perfect products.

As I see it, everyday people in everyday ordinary life aspire to be those perfect people – always looking for this same kind of perfection in themselves and in others- perfect spouses, perfect friends, perfect children.

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