Finding Balance

“It’s not so much that we are afraid of change or so in love with the old ways, but it’s that place in between that we fear.  It’s like being between trapezes”.

-Marilyn Ferguson

 

“There is no such thing as work-life balance.  Everything worth fighting for unbalances your life”.

Alain de Botton

 

“To slave away on the pointless business of mundane life, and then to come out empty is a tragic error”.

-Tibetan Book of the Dead

 

Whenever I know or think my life is on the verge of change, I like to think “maybe this will be a good thing”.  This is the optimist in me.  I tend to believe that even when bad things happen some good will come from it.  It is only human, however, to have moments of doubt or fear while you are swinging through the air hoping your timing and your grasp are perfect when the next trapeze appears.  Much of my life has been a quest for balance.  I always wanted a little of this and a little that while not having too much of either.  The one job I had that created an unbalance in my life was also my favorite job and one of the few from which I was fired.  It’s been a while since my life felt unbalanced.  The last time was probably during my child rearing years.  I had two children and was working a lot of overtime at a new job while also going to night classes at a local college.  I was also experiencing the early stages of what became a health crisis.  I got through it all but in retrospect I prefer a balanced life over a crazy life.  These days I mostly have balance but sometimes it feels unbalanced because some things feel out of proportion to other things.  For example, at this stage of my life I don’t mind working but I would prefer working less.  I don’t have the energy I used to have so three days of work per week would be preferable to my current five days a week.  I need more sleep and I want more leisure.  Sooner or later this will work itself out.  I guess the bottom line is that our lives will feel differently at different stages.  When I was younger and more energetic I could handle a lot more.  Now that I am older and less energetic, I prefer more rest and down time.  With most of the labors of life I have done my time and paid my dues.  Now it is time for more books, more music, more daydreaming, more staring out the window, and less slaving away on the sometimes pointless and mundane business of life.  Been there, done that.