FISA Memo Simplified: We Know What You Did Last Administration

For those that don’t dive into politics (like some of us do), this whole FISA Memo that was released a little while ago probably has you thinking about wrapping your head with duct tape, or simply ignoring the whole thing. Despite the fact that this Memo was boiled down from a massive amount of documentation and testimony, it still reads like War and Peace even if it is only 4 pages. I have spoken to a few of my friends and tried to explain what the Memo means, but I am not sure they get it. I will ask them when they wake up.

So let me try again and I will try to make it easy to grasp.

Once upon a time not too long ago there lived a self entitled aging Princess who expected to be Queen of the World. Her name was Hillary. Her path to the throne was supposed to be simple. She was to have a pretend race against another the aging Prince Bernie and then coast to victory against the Republican by using the woman card and the race card. The world would cheer and we would all live happily ever after under the boot of Queen Hillary and she would grow rich.

But the Republicans had a really strange thing happen on her way to her coronation. The Republican Prince that would challenge her was no ordinary Republican. He was the golden / orange Prince named Trump who tapped into the feelings of the people.

“How can we make sure I win,” she asked?

“Leave it to us,” said her campaign staff.

So they plotted and thought and thought and plotted. And during this period, her Campaign Manager John Podesta fell for the oldest email trick in the book and clicked on a link that said he had to change his email password. Not realizing that this sent him to a fake site, Podesta typed in his old password and “changed” it to a new one. And the hackers that fooled him had his email password.

“I will blame the Russians,” he shouted when he realized he had been duped.

“And we will say Trump was involved,” he added.

“How will we do that,” aging Princess Hillary asked.

“Easy,” he replied, “We will hire someone to dig up Russian dirt on Prince Trump.”

So the Hillary campaign hired a company called Fusion GPS. And even though they were sure Hillary would be Queen, they used a Law Firm to actually pay Fusion GPS who then hired a former British spy named Christopher Steel.

Now Steel was a crafty fellow, but one thing was sure. He absolutely hated Donald Trump and told anyone that would listen that he would do anything to prevent Trump from becoming King.

So Hillary paid the Lawyer who paid Fusion who paid #NeverTrump Brit Steel who paid someone in Russia to make up a bunch of stories about Donald Trump. And these were really good stories and they even used Hookers and urinating on beds Obama slept in all over Russia.

So Hillary read the fabricated stories and then had an idea.

“Let’s tap Prince Trump’s phones in Trump Tower,” she said.

It was a brilliant idea they all said. That way they would know everything he did and said. And they would use anything they heard to make sure Hillary won – just like they did to Bernie!

But first they had to get the Steele Fables to the FBI. Even though they were all either scared of Hillary or friends with her, the Hillary Campaign decided it was best to not have her simply take the fables to her FBI contacts.

So they had their lawyers ask Fusion to hire a woman who’s husband, Bruce Ohr, worked for Obama’s Attorney General Loretta Lynch (Get Back Loretta!). So Fusion hired Nellie Ohr (Whoa Nellie!)

So now they had a path to get the fables to the Department of Justice. So the path to the FBI was from Hillary, through a Law Firm, through Fusion to Nellie at Fusion and right to her hubby, Bruce Ohr. Nobody could ever follow that path, right?

Time was of the essence with the election looming. But there was another problem. How to tap Trump’s phone. Well, there was some dirt in the Steele Dossier about a man named Carter Page having a meeting with Russians a few years back. And Carter Page was a volunteer with the Trump Campaign and would probably be talking to people in Trump Tower. If only they could get FISA Court approval to tap his phone, they could then listen in on conversations of Page and whoever he talked to, then get court permission to tap their lines and cells. And on and on. Until they could listen to every conversation at Trump headquarters.

Thank goodness the FISA Courts are secret. If anyone ever found out the Hillary was using the Loretta Lynch DOJ and the FBI to gain an advantage in the election, well, thank goodness Hillary would be Queen soon and nobody would ever find out.

But there was one more problem. The FBI couldn’t verify much at all in the Dossier. And the court would not just accept the collection of Russian Fables without knowing they were true. So Hillary called the law firm who called Fusion who asked Nellie to tell her Hubby Bruce to get Steele to leak the story from his dossier that Carter Page talked to the Russians a few years ago. And Yahoo News was only to happy to publish the story that other liberal news sites picked up.

“So have you verified this information about Carter Page,” the FISA Judge asked?

“We sure have,” said the FBI. “The story is all over the internet on sites like Yahoo News,” the FBI offered.

“Well then, here’s your wire tap warrant,” the judge said, not knowing he had been duped.

And one after one, a lot of Trump’s campaign people and his transition team were tapped.

The End (of chapter one).

So what happens now?

I am expecting a few people to be leaving their jobs at the FBI and DOJ. These people were nothing more than Hillary campaign workers using the intelligence apparatus of the US Government to spy on their political opponent. These people have tainted the FBI and the DOJ and we cannot trust these agencies to be impartial until some changes are made. We entrust these people with keeping us safe and with that trust we must give them a lot of power over our privace and trust they will not misuse that power. Or the trust.

But that is what they did.

I wouldn’t be surprised if the FISA Judge – or judges – that were made fools of, don’t come after the perpetrators with charges of Contempt, fraud, falsifying documents, or a number of other charges. If they don’t, the judges on the FISA Court look like stooges. And they are already sensitive to being branded the “rubber stamp” court for approving pretty much every warrant.

This is chapter One. There will be as many as 9 more chapters before this book is done. There are a lot more things coming out.

The Democrats told us the sky would fall if this memo were released. But they are only trying to protect their operatives inside the Trump Agencies. They are the resistance. That is all they have left.

Now people will sit back and posture. I hope the swamp is freed of at least a few of the evil creatures.

We shall see.