Canada to send aging Sea King helicopter fleet to Mali

Top brass at the Canadian Forces have been at wit’s end about what to do with their fleet of obsolete Sea King helicopters now that their replacements are coming on stream, a mere 25 years late. Now a win-win solution to the conundrum has presented itself.

The decrepit fleet is to be gifted to the UN mission to restore freedom and democracy to Mali, a benighted land-locked African “shit-hole” nation that has proven remarkably impervious to both freedom and democracy.

The fleet of 18 Sea Kings includes three whirly-birds believed to be fully operable, and the remainder are considered “parts” vehicles. The Canadian contribution to the UN mission will include 750 maintenance technicians tasked with keeping those three operable choppers in the air.

Mali has been over-run with terroristic types ever since the Canadian-led mission to restore freedom and democracy in Libya concluded in 2011. It is believed that the mission will last at least until the last Canadian-owned gold mines in the country are completely worked out.