Pardon my Adultery

By Grant Davies

Presidents can get into political trouble if they make controversial pardons to people who have knowingly broken the laws. It has happened many times in the past.

But if the country elects a Mormon President (or more correctly, a President who is a Mormon), be ready for him to legally forgive all of his fellow Mormons for their crimes of adultery, illegal co-habitation, bigamy, and polygamy. It’s an outrage I tell ya!

Oh, that already happened one hundred and eighteen years ago? Umm, in that case.. never-mind.

It was on this day, September 25th, 1894, that President Grover Cleveland, who turned out to be a two timer himself (in an electoral way), issued a pardon to all the Mormons who committed the above named crimes. I apologize for the confusion.

It seems these issues never get totally resolved, because now-a-days a bunch of other people are agitating to be allowed to define marriage in their own way. But that’s a different story. I’ll tell you all about it someday.

It was only after the Church of Latter Day Saints made it’s own proclamation a few years earlier – saying that they would no longer sanction such unions – that a different President, Benjamin Harrison, pardoned those evil-doers who were repentant and promised not to commit the crimes again.  (Don’t confuse Harrison with his distant relative, “Big Hoss”, who works at a pawn shop that’s featured on The History Channel.)

So the next year when President Cleveland issued his amnesty, he was just making it more official. He claimed that sufficient evidence had been furnished to him to show that members of the church in question had ceased and desisted from breaking the laws. So he decided that they could have their rights back. Oh yeah, they could have all their stuff back too. In the end, it’s all about the stuff, isn’t it?

So if you are even considering hooking up with more than one person at a time in the future, keep in mind it’s still illegal. And they’re still watching you.

But don’t worry, all is forgiven. At least it was last time.

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2012-09-25 19:30:57

Source: http://cheekyhistory.blogspot.com/2012/09/pardon-my-adultery.html