"Teen Mom 2" Episode 5 Recap: It's a Hard Knock Life For Us.

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 Welcome back to what I hope is not the most boring show on television. This week we have everyone thinking that life will be totally simple, and learning otherwise.  Oh aren’t harsh life lessons so much fun to play out on national television?

Come on, they totally are. 

So this episode was a vast improvement on last week, there were fights, tears, and Kailyn maybe had more then one facial expression.  Exciting right? So lets get to it.

Leah

So this week in children playing house, Leah and Corey move in together.  And now we come to the part of the series where Leah learns how hard it is to actually live with two kids on her own.  Seriously?  This is dull, we see this with every teen mom.  I’m glad to see Leah having to actually care for two of them on her own, but not too impressed with Corey’s lack of, well, anything really.  Corey and Leah then have her parents over for take out, which was kind of hilarious for a lot of reasons.  One of which being Leah’s moms complete lack of reaction to Leah being all “omg! its so hard being a mom!”.  Uh, yes, I think she knows, you’re not gaining any traction here honey, sorry.  So Leah really wants to be able to go back to school, and seeing as Corey never really looks after his daughters, she leaves them with him for a day.  And what a day it was.  Everything about this screams “man not ready or prepared to deal with babies”.  Had to love Leah’s laughing at the constant questions about what to do when they’re crying.   This whole situation teaches Leah that she needs to make sure Corey’s ok with staying home alone if she decides to start school again.  That conversation?  Goes nowhere quickly.  Corey is defensive as all heck about being told he “can’t take care of his kids’ , so we’re back to square one with those two. 

Kailyn

And speaking of a square one, rapper Jo’s all “keeping tabs” on what he does for Kailyn, and reminding her that making breakfast for her and your child makes you a hero worthy of adulation.  Lovely.  Before  I talk too much about Kailyn, can someone please get her more then one facial expression?  It was nice to see her kind of excited about school and sort of mad at Jo, but there seems to be a default blah expression. Anyways, it looks like Jo’s parents are sick of the fighting and lay down the law  pointing out that they need to work together as a couple. Jo being the peacemaker, promptly gets him and Kailyn kicked out of the house. So what does Jo do?  Pick up Kailyn from school and tell her everything? Apologize? No, Jo goes to New Jersey with Isaac and he tells Kailyn that she has to find a place to stay.  Wait wait, it gets better, he does all this over the phone.  Kailyn is naturally not thrilled with this turn of events, and meets with Jo to try to have a discussion about their future, only to find out it’s like talking to a brick wall.  We end with these two on the “we don’t know what we’re doing and we figure we’re kind of screwed” note.  Great.  Loved that Jo’s parents kicked their grandchild out of the house, that’s stellar parenting.

Chelsea

So after all that drama, lets lighten things up and head back over to planet of the idiots, where skunkhead and her assistant Meghan are making a checklist for Adam of things he has to do in order to move in.  Oh that will so totally make him change!  Of course, right.  So Chelsea is pretending to be a student in this episode, wasn’t that adorable? Come on, I’m looking intently at a laptop screen for five minutes and wearing my glasses!  I’m smart!  All hard working students need a break, so  Adam comes over and she presents him with said list.  Naturally, realizing that Chelsea might be asserting some kind of will, he completely shuts down, shrugs, and brushes her off.  That afternoon, Chelsea’s sister comes for a visit and Chelsea goes into the justification-of-adam-moving-in-and-why-i’m-not-telling-dad- story while her sister is naturally the voice of reason and tells her she’s frickin insane.  Ok, Chelsea, let me make this real simple for ya so it’ll get into your over-processed head,  this is your dads house, not yours, he needs to know who’s living in it.  So while Adam takes Aubree to his parents house, Chelsea has a girls day out instead of, you know, working, when dad shows up and basically says everything he’s been saying for the past few episodes.  Adam needs to contribute, step it up, blah blah blah  Lord these people are dumb.

Jenelle

Speaking of dumb, lets head off to the circus that is Jenelle’s life.  This week we meet up with Jenelle trying to go to college, despite her mother who seems to think that she doesn’t deserve it. Ok, call me sensitive, but it broke my heart to see Jenelle’s mother berate her for trying to get into school and refusing to sign the necessary paperwork for financial aid  Love that a parent actually said “why should I do anything for you?”.  Um, because you’re her mother, that’s why. So Jenelle skips out on going home to take care of Jace to spend time with boyfriend-of-the-year Keifer.  When she sleeps through her alarm and arrives back the next day late, things are naturally a mess.  First, she’s yelled at by random boyfriend of her mom, and then mom comes in guns blazing and kicks her out, calling her various charming names and Jenelle leaves with Keifer and all her stuff in tow.  I have to admit, I feel terrible for this girl.  To hear her say that no one loves her, that no one hugs her, is just heartbreaking.  She may not be perfect, lord knows far from it, she’s trying to do things for her own future and she’s being blocked by her so-called mother. She needs support and she doesn’t have it, period.

Next week we have everyone going through tough stuff.  Ali with her MRI, Kailyn and her Jo situation, Adam being himself and Jenelle’s mother winning mother-of-the-year ribbons.

See ya then!