Dealing with Drudge Report Addiction

Alcohol and nicotine addiction are extremely difficult to overcome, but how is it possible to overcome drudge report addiction? Many net surfers are struggling with this terrible illness and have no support group to share with or give much needed feedback and support. As a former newspaper reporter, I had already dealt with the occupational hazards of booze and cigarettes as best as a seasoned veteran news reporter could. But I must confess, this cyber-monkey just won’t release its fetid claws from my fevered brain. While I analyzed and dealt with the various neural pathways and related cerebral chemistry responsible for my previous addictions, I discovered that the pathology of this addiction is unique in the annals of addiction. And I am not alone. Others are beginning to come out even as I speak. Why, there was even a gentleman who came out and confessed to it on drudge report itself. And yes, this is only the proverbial tidal wave. And there exists no known curative therapy or antidote at least at present. And this addiction worsens with each passing year.

I first got hooked some years ago when I was a general assignment reporter working double-shifts. That was when I also started smoking cigarettes and drinking heavily. I mean, at work, I would have an excuse to check it as one of the first things I would do in the morning. In between updating email correspondences and related materials, guzzling down that first pot of coffee, AM radio news reports barking staccato in the background, my glazed bloodshot eyes squinting, focusing Ton the harsh glare of the desktop screen, forcing that pulsating headache from hop-scotching back and forth amongst the tired beer soaked neurons from last night’s binge, gazing, gazing, gazing in amazed apprehension at the phalanx of breaking news too outrageous to believe, yet there it was. I suspect that only news reporters and their editors truly realize that one proverbial adage is actually very true: Truth is stranger than fiction. No fiction writer could ever even come close to what occurs every moment of every day in this life on this planet. And throughout the day, in between hashing out the local news stories and field work, I would find myself consciously then subconsciously, slavishly, going back to the report to see if there were any more updates.

Since that time, I have found myself unable to quit drudge report cold turkey. Oh, I tried. And I tried and I tried, but after going through a couple days of withdrawal, I start jonesing, breaking into sweats, and all the other well-known withdrawal symptoms from kicking a powerful habit. Some day, hopefully not TOO soon, I expect to trudge my weary body in front of drudge and find out that the world has already ended. Only nobody took the time to tell me. Oh well, there is nothing quite like sitting there in stupefied mesmerism, watching the ongoing train wreck of Western Civilization… -©2014 T.K. Perry