Why Bad Language Makes You Ugly

I regret most of the things i have said. To my family, friends and enemies. Harsh words and bad language never help. In my experience they do more damage to the giver than the receiver.

The thing about malicious and harmful words is that there is almost always intent. It takes effort to conjure up insults, debasements, rumors and lies – and a lot of this is done with the expressive intent of emotionally, physically and physiologically hurting someone.

I have done this many times and each time i tell myself its going to be the last. Then someone makes a snide comment or an insinuating insult and there I go again. It’s a pride issue, trying to save face while burning everyone else to the ground.

There is a subconscious desire to always stay on top of another individual.

Most of our lives is a constant battle of silent dialogue with our friends, family, acquaintances and enemies to test who’s subconsciously the “higher value individual”

Think about it. A lot of people associate with those whom they feel are “lesser value” than themselves. It’s the egos mechanism of feeling superior. It is always fighting tiny mental battles of the minutest relevance to gain the upper hand.

“I have a better car,” “people listen to me more that her,” “I am more educated, I know better.”

These and countless other thoughts of comparison are rife within us and we often compare ourselves with those closest to us.

Can we really be considered true friends or loving brothers and sisters if we are in a constant state of competition where egos define our way of life?

We frame a reality around us. Our environment, friends and family are part of that reality. We give ourselves a place or “title” in that reality we have created.

When that title is threatened, then we become malicious, sinister and hateful towards those that we sense are threatening our reality. A reality where the ego is exalting us as being better that the rest.

It begins like a virus – thoughts spread slowly, negativity creeps, we look for excuses to justify what we feel. When we let this build, it eventually needs to vent in the form of linguistic filth.

Words affect people more than we care to comprehend. What we say to someone festers within them, even though externally they might put on a nonchalant facade. This festering grows into resentment and they conjure how to get back at you – it becomes an eternal cycle, all started by a fragile ego.

Bad language has very apparent and almost instant negative effects on you – the speaker. The subject is affected by their own psyche based on how they comprehend what you say.

If it does not affect them in any way they are not scarred – buy you, as a result of blurting obscenities will still have to pay the repercussions.

Just to touch the surface – obscene, hateful and malicious language degrades your physical appearance, you become a pariah, and people will avoid your presence and cast you out.

You become increasing stressful which affects both mental and physical components of your well-being and will lead to unhealthy and shortened lifespans.

You will also find yourself more susceptible to negative energies. You will be more accident prone, subject to physical attacks, abuse and theft. Everything will stand as an impediment to you moving ahead in life

To overcome this, you have to first start with acceptance of you ego’s frailties. There will be times where it feels threatened and you get jealous, frustrated and angry towards your friends of family.

A simple technique I use but albeit not very easy to utilize is to think about what I say before I say it. If anger creeps up and I have harsh words to spout, I run the gamut through my mind first to fully comprehend what I am saying.

When you do this you will begin to realize that inherent harshness of what you meant to say. If it affects you, imagine how it will affect the recipient?

Once you begin to accept the fact you do get angry, jealous, and envious and frustrated then you can start to heal. There is no shame in feeling this way.

It’s our burden as humans to carry such emotions. However our reactions to such negativity, within ourselves and to those in our lives is what will eventually define us as humans.