Leftover Utopia

 Leftover Utopia

Thomas More’s Utopia was first published in 1516, and remains the object of much speculation to this day. It’s still discussed if the book was just a reverie of a Shangri-la, a satire of political chaos, or both.

Today “utopia” brings to mind not only a fantasy land, but also unrealistic goals and lunatic ideologies. For some, standing up for their country is reality, duty and a pressing need; others will applaud enemy’s dreamland, currently under construction on their own territory.

Those who elect tyrants and go with the flow, have a disturbing tendency to declare their “commitment to pacifism”, as soon as it’s time to fight the wars they brought us, and sort out the mess they had created. Traditionally, someone else should die for them so they can brand him a” baby-killer” and take our sacrifice and their own freedom for granted; again and again.

Imagine that for once we do not have to pay for their mistakes and that both factions receive a territory and the opportunity to create their own dreamland…

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At last we can open our borders without your silly protests! What a triumph! We’ve lost count of the number of newcomers, but who cares? Our Great Leader has just promised he would personally select a strategically important pool of immigrants. Sharing viruses and workplace violence with the rest of the world is noble and worth pursuing!

At last our borders are impassable, our people benefit from top-level security. Our tourism-related policies are very strict, and immigrating to our country is a privilege reserved for a chosen few who deserve special mention for their devotion to our great country. Our leaders are accountable to us, not to foreigners. We respect ourselves, and others have no other choice but to respect us.

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Guns are banned, no need for army; the police changed name to polite force, and the officers have the cutest uniforms: rainbow jackets and mom’s jeans! Our Great Leader has his “private security services” in every town, and he kept some drones and other stuff. He didn’t really comment on that matter, just winked at folks and said: “the answer is blowin’in the wind”. Now, is he cool, or what?

Our Constitution is sacred for us, our rights unalienable. We strengthened our army, our soldiers are the best and our police officers are known to be reliable, efficient and tough. They deserve a great salary and even greater respect. We believe Benjamin Franklin’s:” It’s the first responsibility of every citizen to question authority” and our government’s duty is to serve and protect us, not the other way around.

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We have to accept unemployment, low salaries and higher taxes as a part of our National Sharing Plan. It’s difficult to comply with demands from new citizens and afford paying for their large families, but we must adapt because we are tolerant. We are aware of your hostile propaganda: Yes, the fact that Our Great Leader’s executive order modified his own religion, making him also The Only Religious Leader caused some confusion among the newly immigrated residents. We are not, however facing a war; this is only your usual war-mongering vocabulary. And if we were attacked or invaded, our TV would have announced it. Duh! P.S. Not being boorish as you are, our Great Leader kindly accepted the birthday gift you‘ve sent him.

The pair of pink shorts our honorable Sheriff sent your leader was not a birthday gift, but a reminder. We are happy your leader is getting used to wearing them. There are other fancy gizmos waiting for him in Leavenotworth …We have low taxes and can work even a few jobs. Our media report facts, and not some pre-masticated messages. We enjoy our liberties and our freedom of speech.

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Our country is being invaded, we have also a civil war and our Great Leader decided to stay in power forever, so we can’t even vote! We asked if we can have your boots on the ground but you selfishly answered:”Nope, No you can’t”. We offered to give you tips on how to run the economy and to re-organize your country as soon as you liberate us, but you turned down even this generous proposition. It only strengthens our opinion that all you’ve got should be given to us, because we would know how to use it for a greater good. The world where you had to follow our orders would be a better place!

We are sad to hear that you’ve destroyed yet another country, but it’s your own territory so deal with it.And, yes we are happy to hear that you have lost your legislative power.

The world where you can’t vote is already a better place.