Emblematic Seattle Target Rampage

Both Target and Seattle are well known for their progressive politics. What better place to relish the cultural enrichment of America’s progression into a Third World nation than in a Target store in Seattle? Jason L. Lewis, age 41, pillaged a downtown location last month.

He confronted workers, headbutted a Target sales associate, destroyed displays, tried to kick open a locked display containing Apple iPads, and threw the heavy display down a store escalator while customers scrambled to get out of the way.

Possibly not wanting to end up like Starbucks, Target management let him engage in these activities unmolested for an extended period of time.

Lewis loaded every iPad and Apple watch from the case into his duffel bag, which police say he stole the same day from the Columbia store down the street, along with the clothes he was wearing.

He walked out of the store lugging a heavy load of loot. Black Lives Matter will be horrified to learn that the racist police arrested him later that day for car prowling.

Authorities let him out of jail almost immediately. He returned to loot the same Target twice more over the next few days.

Lewis’s contributions to society unsurprisingly consist of a long criminal history.

No doubt Jason Lewis has endured a hard life of microaggressions and discriscrimination. But don’t go through too many boxes of tissues crying for him; the system that breeds and encourages Jason Lewises is sure to let him out of jail again soon.

On a tip from Dave.

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